IDS #160 - Heartburn, Hot Dogs, and Hanson

EPISODE 160 HEART BURN, HOT DOGS AND HANSON

Mike: [00:00:00] Getting ready to do another episode right now,

I've 

Darin: always said that if my son thinks of me as one of his idiot friends, and I've succeeded as a dad. Welcome to Irritable Dead Syndrome. Boy, we sure need this rain. Give it up for your hosts. Mike and Darren. 

Mike: Hey, I'm Mike. I'm Darren. And this is Irritable Dead Syndrome. Cincinnati's Comedy podcast. Hey, kids,

don't, you're gonna get over the speed bump of the laugh. And then you came back with the 

Darin: crusty thing. Uh, tonight on the show I want to talk about Hansen, and I don't think Mike's gonna want to, but I don't 

Mike: care. [00:01:00] Oh. I've got all kinds of things to say about they s have rebooted 

Darin: umba. Okay. And I think it's badass.

Okay. And we, I, we can't even probably play part of the song book suit. No, we're 

Mike: not gonna do that yet. We're not gonna do that. And, uh, I'm gonna talk about hot dogs and American Classic. See, you 

Darin: said that last episode. Mm-hmm. You said that the episode before that, Darren. So before we go on, Yeah. Mike, what's the deal?

What's the 

Mike: deal with hot dogs? You know, for years people complained about hot dogs. Mm-hmm. They're nothing but lips and tolls. Yes. Why would you want to put that? Thank you, John Candy in, in bread and eat it. Mm-hmm. Cause it's delicious. And I agreed with that. Yeah. I agreed with that. Uh, they give me heartburn.

Mm-hmm. You'll notice that I ate hot dogs when you came over. I had two hot dogs that I grilled. Yeah. And I ate 'em. And then I just had to take some tums because I've got hot dog heartburn. I get hot dog heartburn. That's weird. I know. Okay, I get it from, Pizza. Mm-hmm. Grease in general, which is typically found on pizza.

Right? And hot dogs. I always get heartburn now. I eat like really hot, spicy wings, [00:02:00] really spicy stuff. Curry all that stuff. Doesn't gimme heartburn. Pizza, hot dogs. They gave me heartburn. 

Darin: That doesn't make any sense. 

Mike: It, I don't care. It's what happens. That's how I am. They, you know, thank God I didn't have like we any weird diseases or I don't know that I have any yet.

Right. But I do have that, and I'm okay with that. I'll take a handful of Tums every time I have a hot dog or pizza. The point is, okay, that back in the day mm-hmm. The way that I ate hot dogs was you poke it with the fork. Mm-hmm. You wrap it in a paper towel, you put it in a microwave, 30 seconds, put it in a bun, slap some ketchup on it and eat that thing.

Bam. I got sick of that. Yeah, 

Darin: we have microwaving. It makes them kind of stretchy. Kinda leathery. 

Mike: Yeah. Kind of chewy. Okay. Yeah, so we have a grill. Uh, yeah. And I enjoy, I grill so much that my family gets sick of it. It's like we're having steak again. I've 

Darin: started grilling 

Mike: more. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Uh, just recently I've learned how to grill chicken, and I know you think grilling chicken is easy?

It's not, it's always been hard for me. Yeah. [00:03:00] That's what she 

Darin: said. I'm, 

Mike: I'm a master of steak, so much so. Okay. Last night we went to the capital grill. Okay. Which is a high end steak place here in the Cincinnati's. Okay. Or this is one of the places it's at. And we got it. And I'm like, this just is not as, this is not as good as daddy's steak.

Yeah. It's not objectively not as good as what I can produce. Yeah. On that grill out there. But we kinda get sick of doing the same things all the time. I started grilling hot dogs as part of the thing. Yeah. And the grilled hotdog. Mm-hmm. Versus a microwave hotdog. Yeah. There's no comparison. Okay. And then a wild, I got a wild hair up my ass.

Oh. I was in Kroger. And I saw yellow mustard and I thought there's no condiment more obnoxious than yellow mustard. I hate yellow mustard. I'm buying some. Okay. Couple weeks ago, all these things hit at the same time. I grilled a hot dog. Mm-hmm. I had yellow mustard and I had the old standby ketchup. The planets align.

Planets align. Wow. I put all those things together and I [00:04:00] almost choked on the first bite of that hot dog, and I said, and I quote,

Darin: Roof. Thank. And Beth said, what? I don't know if I had to roof 

Mike: you or not.

Darin: And 

Mike: it was amazing. Uhhuh. I grilled two more hot dogs. Yep. You should only have two hot dogs at any given time. That's true. I had three at this moment. I had to go lie down. Yeah.

If you, you, here's what I'm saying. Give me two hot dogs. Give me some mustard. Give me ketchup. I'm a happy guy. Happy, happy guy. Imm a happy guy. Yeah. And I've gotten judgmental of hot dogs that aren't made that way. Right. Like, if we go to a concert at the River Bends and you, you get a, a $15 hotdog from them.

They pull a, a dilapidated wiener from the water. Yeah. They throw it in a bun, they wrap it up in foil and they throw it at your face. Don't they have 'em on the rollers? I [00:05:00] don't know. I think they just have a water bath of sad wieners in there. Yeah, I know. That's how 

Darin: the street vendors do it. Yeah. Street vendors in New York and who, wherever.

Mm-hmm. Check local listings. Whenever you find your street vendor. Yeah. They've got 'em in the hotdog water. What you do? I can eat a boiled hotdog. Yeah. I don't like a microwave hotdog. Yeah. But I can boil 

Mike: a hotdog. I don't want a boil hotdog. I want a grilled hotdog. I want it to be blistered. Mm-hmm. And have little uh, black marks, the grill marks all down.

Now 

Darin: I can also. Fry it up in a skillet. Yeah. If you need it. Yeah. And I like it that way, but I'm not gonna fire up the grill, um, for a 

Mike: hotdog. I do that all the time. Okay. Yeah. I do it all the time. Yeah. And I do, so I won't fire up the grill at two in the morning mm-hmm. For a steak or a cheese. Well, I have done it for a cheeseburger.

Right. But I will for 

Darin: a hotdog. Right. Um, uh, so a hotdog story. Uh, at our church. Mm-hmm. Uh, every, uh, they have a lot of volunteer opportunities. Okay. So what we were going to do was we were going to this very [00:06:00] low income, uh, uh, poverty stricken neighborhood. Yeah. In the Cincinnati area. Okay. And it was near Halloween.

Yeah. So all the adults and kids were encouraged to dress up. What we're gonna do is we're gonna go to this neighborhood and we are going to all bring donations. Okay. For the people in this neighborhood? Yeah. And we were going to grill hot dogs. Okay. Okay. And it's gonna be like a, a, a thing. There's gonna be games for the kids and face painting.

Yeah. And uh, and any person who lived in the neighborhood can come and eat as many hot dogs as they wanted to. Yeah. So we went and I was on one of the teams that was grilling the hot dogs. Mm-hmm. Um, I wasn't grilling, but I was, uh, bunning them. And wrapping them. I would put them in the buns and wrap them.

I just, you were key to the process. I was, I was like the fourth, uh, cog in the wheel, so to speak. Yeah. And I was dressed as Troy Polamalu from the Pittsburgh Steelers. Okay. Okay. He is the guy with a really long black, curly hair. Okay. He's in the NFL Hall of Fame. Okay. I'm dressed as Troy Polamalu. I [00:07:00] got my Apollo jersey, uh, uh, a hoodie over or under my jersey.

Yeah. And I've got this long black, curly haired wig with a Steeler hat on backwards. Yeah. And I'm, uh, Bagging up these hot dogs for a couple of hours, okay? Okay. And, uh, I'm handing out hot dogs, handing out hot dogs. Finally. I was just like exhausted and I was getting really hot and I said, I can't do this anymore.

And I took off my hat and pulled off my wig. Nobody around there knew it was a wig. What happened? They're like, 

Mike: what? You blew 

Darin: mines that day. They didn't. I'm like, you guys have, I mean, I know. Uh, there was a lot of people that I met for the first time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh, but they did not know that it was wig Uhhuh thing was we brought way too many hot dogs.

Yeah. We had like 50 or to a hundred extra hot dogs and we're we're just grilling and grilling and grilling. Mm-hmm. And they're just piling up and piling up and they're like, I, I think we're making too many hot dogs here. Yeah. Uh, why don't you go ahead and, and grab one if you're hungry. So I ate a hot dog.

Okay. And then, um, a [00:08:00] little bit later. We still got too many hot dogs. Yeah. Yeah. I had another one. Okay. I found out that my boys each had had like five or six hot dogs before we left. We still had all, there's like Darren have take some more. I mean, I think I took four Yeah. More with me. I, I think that day I ate four.

Yeah. And then took a few home, but man, was I, uh, ehh. Yeah. Another thing that, this is the volunteer portion of equal dad syndrome. Again, my church, we do a lot of volunteer opportunities, Uhhuh. So one of these things we did was they have this place where you can go and you can package up bagged food to send to, uh, needy countries.

So what they do is they take these bags and they send them to this country, uh, near Somalia. With all these people who, and they need food. They need fresh wine, uhhuh. So we formed these assembly lines. Yeah. And my job was to put the bag under the funnel. Okay. And then one person puts in protein powder.

One person scoops in dried vegetables, another person scoops in soy. [00:09:00] Another person scoops in rice 

Mike: protein powder. I was like, what are they trying to get swole? Is that where Okay. No, you 

Darin: need protein. Yeah, I, I get it. Get need protein. Yeah. And then you hand the bag off and then they seal it uhhuh and we put it in a box.

So we sent off like thousands of these bags. Yeah. Right. And so, you know me, And when there's other kids, I like to mess with the kids. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The protein powder is yellow and we're, I got my bag under there and I'm waiting for this little girl who's next to me to put the protein powder in.

Yeah. And I looked at her and I said, Hey, I need you to put some of the banana powder in there. She says, That's not banana powder. Yeah. I said it looks like banana, but it's not. Yeah. You pissed her off. I said, but it looks like banana. Mm-hmm. I said, well then what is it? She says, it's soy. Yeah. What did you think it was?

I said, I thought it was banana, and we're having so much fun with these kids. Yeah. Yeah. This portion of our show is brought to you by Diff liquid concentrated wallpaper stripper. Hi, I'm Dave Lay and back in my twenties I made a pretty good living [00:10:00] stripping wallpaper and I always used diff. I remember thinking that I could use an inferior product, take twice the time and make more money, but honesty runs deep in my blood and I'm brand loyal.

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Now I wanna talk about Umba. Okay? Okay. I 

Mike: love the song Umba. So when you said they redid the song, they 

Darin: rerecorded it. They rerecorded. It's called Umba 2.0. Oh boy. It's Hansen and it's really good. And the crazy thing is after we were driving home Yeah, from the volunteering Jacob was driving. Yeah. And we were in Jacob's car and he wanted to play some songs that he liked.

And he played a song called, uh, was it The Six Shooter? [00:11:00] It was really good. Okay. And we did, uh, tonight. Tonight by, uh, yeah. Smash Pumpkin. Shelly? No, no. Shelly Ray Tonight. Tonight there's a rooftop party on the top of the world tonight. Tonight. We like that song. Okay. He played like five or six songs that we like.

Okay. Because we're getting into this thing where Jacob's like, how come you guys don't like my music? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because if he starts playing, there's some, some rap music that he plays and I'm sorry, but I don't like it. Yeah. But he played four or five songs that we really liked. Yeah. And I said, well, why don't you listen to this?

Okay. And I said, play it and Bop. Yeah. And he's like, what's that? Yeah. And he puts it on. He loved it. Absolutely loved it. Yeah. And then we played, you make me feel like Dancing by Leo Sayer. He loved that too. Okay. Yeah. All right. Because he is, he likes songs that you can dance to. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. But Hanson, God love him, have re-released Umba 2.0.

Rerecorded. They rerecorded it. And since we can't play it. Yeah. But I strongly encourage everybody to uh, go, 

Mike: go listen to it and come back. Go, go listen to it and come back.[00:12:00] 

Darin: Welcome back. Welcome back. Yeah. I wanna talk about my neighbor, Chris. Michael. Okay. It's hard to find a better neighbor than Chris. Michael. If we go on vacation, Chris Michael comes over and he lets out our rabbit. Mm-hmm. He, he lets figy out a couple times a day. Yeah. Gives Figy his food, his water, his hay, lets him play, and he, he pets him and nuckles him, and he puts him back in his cage.

Getss him in what? And nuckles him. Yeah. Okay. Is that legal? That's, yeah, sure. In Ohio? Yeah, we're in Ohio. Yeah. Okay. 

Mike: Sometimes you gotta take him over to Kentucky to, 

Darin: right. So not only does he, does he do that? Yeah. But if I need to borrow a tool, he has everything in his garage. Yeah. If I can't get my lawnmower to start Uhhuh, he comes over and jumps my lawnmower.

Okay. Well he's, uh, within the last couple weeks, he's done another thing for us that most people don't do. When we got the cake for the graduation party. 

Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He impersonated you. I, no, I had Well, you impersonated him. 

Darin: Ied him. Yeah. I had nowhere to keep the cake, Uhhuh, and so he kept the cake in his refrigerator, his house.

So he is now a [00:13:00] licensed cake sitter. Okay. 

Mike: Okay. 

Darin: Because Libby came home. She's like, I thought you got the cake. I'm like, I did. But Chris is watching it for us. Yeah. 

Mike: I know you brought up cake and I wanna talk about cake. Oh, I love cake. I bought a few weeks ago, I bought two cakes, not made like cake mix.

Two things of cake mix and two things of frosting frosting. Now, one of them was spice cake. 

Darin: Okay, I've had a spice 

Mike: cake. Okay? Mm-hmm. I had not, I got that and I got cream cheese icing to go on it because that seemed like what you would put on spice cake. Yeah, I made that. The family lost their minds. Yeah, they got a piece of cake bite.

And then look at me like serious, like they're about to call me out in a lineup. Uhhuh. Like that's the one. Like she That is amazing. Yeah. Did you make that? Yes, I made that. I didn't, I mean, it, I just poured it into the thing. Mixed it with water and egg, egg, egg. Yeah. And it, I, it came out that way. I, I did put the frosting on it.

The oil? Yeah. Oh yeah. Okay. Yeah. [00:14:00] This is amazing. Yeah. And then Andrew got a piece of it. He's like, oh my Lord. Where did this come from? Well, okay, and then now, now I'm getting, uh, ego. Right? Uh, I can't remember if Charlie liked it. I'm assuming that he does. Uh, it was an amazing cake, Uhhuh. It lasted less than 24 hours in this house.

Oh, that's, yeah. Yeah. So, Around Father's 

Darin: Day. Do you make it in a round pan or in a rec? I made it in a rectangle 

Mike: rectangular pan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. I did a rectangle thing. Okay. So then I had a hanker for cake. Mm-hmm. At about nine o'clock. 10 o'clock at night. I think it was like Friday, I can't remember when it was.

And I'm looking through the cupboards and I noticed that the cake mix from the other cake. Yellow cake. Mm-hmm. And I had vanilla icing. Yeah. I love yellow cake with vanilla icing. Shut up you. Yeah. And I also have vanilla ice cream. I had a vanilla triumvirate there. Uhhuh, but vanilla. What a triumvirate.

It's a three and then a virent. Uh, triumvirate. Yes. I don't know. 

Darin: You keep [00:15:00] using the word. I don't think 

Mike: it means what you think it means. Look it up kids. You, you're very penultimate tonight. Yeah. Yeah. I go to irritable dad syndrome.com and put triumvirate in the search and let me know what comes back.

Okay. I made this cake at late at night. Mm-hmm. And then I got off a respectable piece of it about yay big. Mm-hmm. And ate it standing in the kitchen because you're a man. Cuz that's what I do. Yeah. And then it was over too soon. So I got another piece not quite as big because I have a conscious uhhuh and then I went to bed.

That's what you're supposed to do after you eat a, an ordinate amount of cake. Load up on cake, go scrap to bed, straight to bed. I had some interesting dreams. 

Darin: Same rules. If, if you think you have a concussion,

I don't think so. Just go to bed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You'll be fine. Yeah. But by the way, if, if you have a head injury, do not go to bed. Do not take any medical advice from us here on dead syndrome. 

Mike: [00:16:00] Thank you. Yeah. Yeah. Mike. So I wake up and I look and there's small, what the hell's wrong with this? There's small cake dishes, uhhuh, with lots of icing on them.

Yeah, I think I've talked about it before in this podcast. My family does not like icing, frosting, all that stuff. I find that abhorrent, deplorable, the only. Frosting. Abhorrent, abhorrent, abhorrent. It's the word of the week. The only frosting slash icing that I will remove from a cake is that Kroger whippy.

It just, it's kinda grainy. It's cool whip, cool whip, cool whip. Yeah. Now, once I learned that it was cool whip, cool whip, 

Darin: cool whip, everything tastes better with 

Mike: cool whip. Once I learned it was that I could stomach it. I could, okay, I need to eat this now that I know that's what it is. Why don't they call it that?

Mm-hmm. Some licensing thing. You can't do that. But best uhhuh for the entire time that I've known her. Every piece of cake that she's ever gotten, she will get two or three bites in and she'll say It's just too much [00:17:00] icing, and she'll scrape it off. To me, that's like watching someone kick a puppy. Yeah.

It's, I, it's, I get upset. 

Darin: Libby does the same thing. Hmm. It's like Bess and Libby 

Mike: were separated at birth. So when you're, when you had your amazing cake at, at Costco cake at that party. Yeah. They had balloons that come up about an inch off. It's all frosting. Yeah. I got as much of a balloon as I could get.

Yeah. As I was cutting it, I remember thinking, Mike, this isn't your cake. This is Jacob's cake. You should let Jacob or Cameron eat the balloon. No one else got a balloon. Uhhuh, and then you seem to be cutting the balloon. You had a balloon, didn't you? The other side of me said it's a purple one. Oh oh. The purple ones are the best.

Yeah. And if, if the rest of these people, yeah. Are too nice. Yeah. Too beta. Yeah. To get that balloon. Then I'll go in and I'll get that balloon. Yeah. I'll teach them a lesson. Be more assertive. Get your balloon. And I enjoyed it. And I got halfway through eating the balloon. Then I started to think, that's [00:18:00] too much icing.

And I pushed that way down deep inside. You did? To make more room. Yeah. Yeah. For the balloon. 

Darin: Beautiful. Well, I was outside. I, when I found out that they had gotten into the cake, I'm like, oh yeah, yeah. And I went in, Yeah. And there were four pieces of cake left. Oh God. I'm like, I bought the 

Mike: cake. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So, so now let's come back to the cake that I had in our, in this house this weekend. Okay. I watched Bess in the morning. Yeah. And I exclaimed curse words when she did this. Yeah. To the point where she almost choked. She started laughing so hard, she cut a piece of cake, it somehow landed on her plate. On the side.

Mm-hmm. It flipped over, icing down, and then in one movement with her wrist, she flipped it. And it flipped icing, less uhhuh upright next to a perfect sorcery, perfect icing. Icing on thing. And then instead of like, she should have done, instead of screaming and disgust and throwing that in the trash, like the abomination, that is, she [00:19:00] dove into the uniced, uniced, unfrosted.

Mm-hmm. Cake. Mm. And put that in her mouth. What? And finished it and then scraped the frosting into the trash and put the plate into the sink like a fricking 

Darin: barbarian. I'm, I'm listening, but I'm also, uh, going on Google looking up marriage counselors. 

Mike: I was, Appalled I was, that was abor. Part of me was appalled.

Mm-hmm. But another part of me was, I am was impressed that in one def move she de-iced the cake. Yeah. It was like the flick of a wrist. Yeah. Because that icing was on that cake. I put that icing on that cake. 

Darin: Yeah. Hard. Hello. So 

Mike: that's, I wasn't, I wasn't hard what I was putting. Right, right. You know what I 

Darin: mean?

You know what I'm saying? So we had a Costco cake Yeah. At Jacob's graduation party a week before we had a Costco cake. Yeah. Because the, the week before was when all the family were up. Uhhuh, Eddie, Gina, Ryan, uh, [00:20:00] my mom, aunt Peggy. So you had two Costco cakes, and how 

Mike: were you not in the emergency room now?

We had one week 

Darin: apart. Okay. Okay. So when my birthday rolled around, Libby asked, do you want a Costco cake? I'm like, no. I was like, I would love one, but no, because you need like 30 people to eat one of those Costco cakes. And I said, no. Uh, just, you know, don't buy me one, but if you, if you make me one, yeah, but this time I want a butt cake.

She says. You mean a bunt cake? I said no, it's called a butt cake. Okay. Okay. We've got the bunt pan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. And we never use it. I was like, I want a bunt cake. Yeah, yeah. But I call it a butt cake because butt cake is funny. Yeah. Yeah. I want a butt cake. It is funny. And so Libby finally was like, okay, well I don't know how to frost a butt cake.

Yeah. I said, she says, you gotta melt it and drizzle it. I'm like, no, just slap it on there. Yeah. She goes, but it's gonna look ugly. I'm like, I don't care. Yeah. I don't care. Yeah. I'm going to eat it. Yeah. Okay. Now, years ago I made her a birthday cake Uhhuh. And I took the fork. When you, when you frost the cake, do you [00:21:00] take your fork and do the, the wavy lines?

No. Do you do 

Mike: Yeah, I, but I have a new, I have a new technique that I do. Oh, oh, okay. Yeah, I, I, I whip it like crazy until it's like, mostly it, it gets softer uhhuh, and then you could just spread it all over there without ripping the top layer of the cake. Oh, I've done, I've done that. Well, 

Darin: the trick to not tearing the top layer off the cake uhhuh is to let it cool down.

Long enough. Yeah. Even when I do that, I still, if you ice it when it's still hot. Yeah. 

Mike: You, you need to understand how I, this is a comedy podcast by the way. You need to understand how I come to come to cake. I come to cake like a junkie. Okay. Yeah. I'm shaking. Yeah. I need that cake. Yeah. And I'm doing, it's everything in my power to not just eat that frosting.

Raw right as that it gets on the spoon. Mm-hmm. It's not guaranteed that it's gonna make it under the cake. It may hit my mouth Yeah. Before it gets there. So I'm shaking and yeah. That's, that's gotta be 

Darin: factored in. But yeah. So, but yeah, you gotta let the frosting uhhuh, uh, warm up. Yeah. And you gotta let the cake.

Cool. Mm-hmm. Before you guys, anyway, so we had the butt cake. Yeah. And Livy put the frosting on it and she [00:22:00] goes, oh, I don't think it's really pretty. I was like, I don't care. I'm gonna put that in my mouth. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I, oh man. And it is, and I don't know why, but butt cake tastes better than we need it in a slice.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And eat in a little square. Well, here's, 

Mike: here's something that I want to do, and I call this my, when I give up, when I've just have given up, I've, I've talked about it before on this podcast. I didn't call it my give up moment, but I, I want to get a, a. Plethora of ice cream sandwiches. Okay.

And I want to have an ice cream sandwich, an ice cream sandwich, and then another ice cream sandwich. Mm-hmm. To make an ice cream sandwich of ice cream sandwiches and eat that. And I told best that, and she just looked at me like she needs to take me to the hospital, but I want to after. And I came up with this idea while I was at your house eating your cake with the balloon.

Yeah. I would like to order a fresh new cake. From, uh, what is it, Costco? Yeah. Put it on the table. Lay it all out on the table, and just reach in with my hands. Mm-hmm. And [00:23:00] grab a handful of cake. Yeah. And eat it. And just be nasty. Yeah. And lick my hands. And then just go and eat as much as I can. Yeah. Before I pass out into the cake.

And then someone just leave me there. I mean, if I go face down, put a straw or a snorkel in there. 

Darin: Now did you guys do that for your kids' birthdays when they were little? Yeah. Yeah, because when Cameron was one and 

Mike: Libby let em, let em go in there and 

Darin: get, Libby bought em a brand new. Little blue and white outfit.

And I'm like, why? Mm-hmm. Because I was gonna put him in a oney or just in his diaper. Yeah. But no, he has to have a, he has to have a new outfit for his birthday. I was like, okay. So we were in North Carolina. Mm-hmm. And we went there and we were staying at a hotel. Mm-hmm. And, uh, everybody's there at this hotel.

And I asked the people who work there, I said, can we use the little room where you have the morning breakfast? Mm-hmm. For this birthday party? Absolutely. Mm-hmm. And you could even borrow this hide chair. No. So Cameron's there. And he's got his, we cut him a piece of cake and he picks it up, looks at it, bam.

Instantly [00:24:00] all over the face. It gets all over him. Yeah, it gets all over the high chair. That's a good time. Oh yeah. It was great. After he was done, Libby's mom and Libby took Cameron. Took him and put him in the bathtub. Okay. In their hotel room. We ended up having to throw the outfit away, could not wash the stuff out.

I went to the front desk and I said, I need all the cleaning supplies and wash towels that you have. Yeah. To clean your high chair. And they're like, oh, we'll do that. Like you don't want a part of this. Yeah. Yeah. It took me like an hour to clean the high chair, but this cake 

Mike: everywhere. Astute listeners to the podcast will think, well, Mike said he has a problem with food touching his face.

Not cake. Not cake. I will. Smear cake. You remember Mrs. Doubtfire Uhhuh when he put his Yeah. He put his face in the cake and came up and it looked like a, a mask. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Gets me Every time. 

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And remember, get a ruler and measure it yourself. If your hotdog isn't a foot long, they'll refund your money. Guaranteed. Now, back to you guys in the studio. I had to run out and do some errands. Okay. And I hadn't eaten yet. Uhhuh, so I ran through Taco Bell. Okay. Okay. And I got two, uh, five layer, uh, beefy burritos.

Okay. I love the beefy burritos at Taco Bell. Yeah. Yeah. I pull into the place where I'm getting ready to do my first errand and I'm gonna eat cuz you can't eat Taco Bell while you're driving. You right? You can't. Yes you can. Well, you can if you wanna. It depends on what you get, if you wanna spill it all over yourself.

Okay, so I'm sitting there in the parking lot. Yeah. I'm eating my Taco Bell [00:26:00] Uhhuh, and what happens? But somebody pulls up right in front of me parking. Yeah. And they stay in their truck and they're just watching you eat Taco Bell and, and they've got a tinted window. So I don't know if they're just staring at me.

I hate that. I, I don't like, so I'm just like, You know, just like eating, like I'm going to eat this gingerly. Yeah. And then I eat a little bit more and then they don't leave and their engine's running. Yeah. I'm like, hell, what are you a freak? Yeah. And they just keep looking at me. Well, I assume they're looking at me.

Mike: Just stare unblinking of where they would be the entire time while you, I should, I should just, 

Darin: just stare right at 'em and just put the food right. My mouth just like, yeah. Or you know, just push it in there. That's what she said. Okay. Anyway, I got uncomfortable after a while. I'm like, screw this. Yeah. I backed the car out and I parked somewhere else that, that wasn't awkward at all because I don't, yeah.

I was like, I'm trying to eat here. Yeah. Stop staring at me. Yeah. What happens? Somebody pulls up next to me in a different car and I'm like, are is, is anybody gonna let me eat my food? Oh, I'm, I'm gonna parking lot's my, it's my God-given right [00:27:00] to eat Taco Bell in a parking lot. Do you remember when we went.

And, uh, taught the class on how to do a podcast. I 

Mike: went and when we talked to a class about a podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We talked to the 

Darin: class. We taught them what we know about making a podcast. Yeah. And one of the questions was, can you do a podcast about anything? Yes. And I said, yeah, you can do a podcast about anything.

I said, if you wanna do a podcast on your favorite type of cereal and eat a different type of cereal every week. Yeah, you can do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Turns out. There's a, there's a guy. Yeah. Serial time. I reached out to him. Uhhuh tried to get Mr. Serial time to be a guest on this show. Oh, yeah. Uh, never heard back.

Okay. Well, he's too big now. Well, I found out that he's retiring. He's no longer doing serial time on YouTube. He's run of serial, 

Mike: maybe? Oh, no. 

Darin: Oh, no. No. He's still, has, he, he, I, I cannot recommend. Strongly enough to go to Twitter. Mm-hmm. Or YouTube and look up cereal time. Okay. And watch this guy, [00:28:00] because he is fascinating.

Yeah. He talks about the box, he talks about the toy that came in. He talks about the texture. It, it, it tastes kind of like this, but it's colored. This, he's done like his top 10 favorites. His uh, what? The cereal owl? He's like, oh yeah. Yeah. It's fascinating. And he knows every cereal. That's every, he is the Adam Niff of cereals.

Okay. So I have 

Mike: two things. Okay. Yeah. One is I got a crunch cup and matter of fact, I got two crunch cups. Okay. It's the greatest thing I own. What's a Crunch cup? It allows you to eat cereal while you're driving. Okay. While you're walking. Okay. Whatever. It's a cup that has the milk on the outside, uhhuh and cereals on the inside.

And when you tip it up, the milk and the cereal come into your mouth at the same time. Shut up. Yeah. And you can control how much milk goes in with your, I'll show you how to do it. It's amazing. Yeah, that's, that's how I eat breakfast. I eat b, how I eat cereal while I'm driving to work. How have I not known about the Crunch Cup?

I'm gonna show you a Crunch Cup when we go up there. Okay? It's amazing. Uh, we 

Darin: want to thank you for listening and we, as always, we encourage you to go to irritable dad syndrome.com and, [00:29:00] and listen to download as many episodes as you want. They're all there. Uh, 1 56 is gonna be a candidate for the podcast Hall of Fame.

It's pretty good, honest to God, seriously. Yeah, you're gonna like that one. So, um, yeah. Uh, take care of yourselves and to each other and we hope to see you again. I stole that from church. He's dead. He can't sue me. He can't do. We hope to see you next week on Irritable Dance Syndrome. Well, that's it for this week.

Keep it real and as always, word to your mother and you thought we had nothing 

Mike: to talk about. It started with wieners and ended up started a wholesome. A wholesome place. 

Darin: Check. 1, 2, 3. Check 1, 2, 3. Welcome to irritable Dead syndrome. Boy, we sure need a rain. Give what 

Mike: we need to end this. We do.[00:30:00]