Cincinnati's Comedy Podcast!
May 21, 2024

IDS #205 - Apologies to Bob and Tom AKA The Naked Lady on the Dragon

IDS #205 - Apologies to Bob and Tom AKA The Naked Lady on the Dragon
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Irritable Dad Syndrome

Kicking off this week's episode with a heartfelt apology to the awesome folks at the Bob and Tom show!

Tune in as we chat about the Pop Tart movie, Darin’s take on watching Pulp Fiction with his kid, our favorite Atari 2600 games, and Mike’s wish for a Game of Thrones edit minus the nudity.

This episode has a bit of everything for everyone!

#BOBANDTOM #OtisElevators #Unfrosted #PopTarts #JerrySeinfeld #PulpFiction #Atari #Pitfall #PacMan #Adventure #GameOfThrones

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Transcript

Mike: If you haven't watched this, if you don't know what we do, welcome.

Darin: Hi.

Mike: This is our podcast, irritable dad syndrome.

Mike: We're both dads. We're irritable. Yes, we have multiple syndromes. This is another fun aspect of our show is there's a lot of watching us get our crap together.

Darin: Tom also lost $30 million in crypto. Tom, how did you fall for that? I mean, even Bronc was like, me.

Mike: No, that not real money.

Dave: Like, welcome to irritable dad syndrome. It's crunchy on the outside and creamy in the center. Here are your hosts, Mike and Darren.

Darin: Hi, I'm Darren.

Mike: I'm Mike.

Darin: Welcome to irritable dad syndrome. This is episode 205. We are Cincinnati's comedy podcast.

Mike: We have all kinds of fun things planned. We do in theory. I'm looking them up right now.

Darin: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. One of the things I want to talk about tonight is unfrosted. That's right. I'm going to talk about the Jerry Seinfeld pop tart movie, and I loved it. That's the pop tart movie.

Mike: Yeah, yeah, I saw that in the rundown. I didn't know what that was. Yeah, yeah.

Darin: before we start, while Mike is looking up things, while Mike is preparing, I owe the folks at Bob and Tom show an apology. Many years ago, I used to work with a guy, and we were going on a, on a shoot. We were loading up gear, and we were at the elevator, and he asked me, he said, are you brand loyal? Do you only ride Otis elevators? And I thought that was the funniest thing that I'd ever heard. And he said that if it's not a notice, he takes the stairs, right? And I asked him, I said, can I use that on my podcast? He says, absolutely. So I started writing commercials for Otis elevators, being brand loyal. And if it's not an Otis, you should take the stairs. last week, I'm driving Cameron to school, and on the way home, I turned on the bob and Tom show, and I heard Tom say that. That he was brand loyal. He only rides Otis elevators. And if it's not a notice, he takes the steps. And I thought, son of a bitch, he stole that light. Wait a minute. Yeah, hold on a second. That can't be. I was like, I can't even fathom them a listening to this podcast be stealing from this podcast.

Mike: So you think this guy heard that on their show? Yes.

Darin: I reached out to my friend, and I said, years ago, when we worked together, I you had said that. And he says, oh, yeah, I heard that on the Bob and Tom showed.

Mike: Oh, boy.

Darin: So all this time, we have been stealing an Otis elevator bit from the Bob and Tom show, and I want them. I doubt seriously anybody from Bob and Tom listens to this podcast.

Mike: You should report us. Anybody listening now should report us to the Bob and Tom show. Get them to talk about it.

Darin: If they do, I just want you to know I am sorry. It was unintentional. I did not mean to steal that from you. If there's anybody who knew that that was something that was heard on the Bob and Tom showed and thought that I had stolen that, I apologize to you. And I'm telling you right now that we're not going to do that anymore. I feel like crap, because, I mean, it's like I, you know, wrote, I try to write my own material.

Mike: Yeah. So here's what you do.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: go to bobandtom.com, right. And there's a contact thing. Email them. Huh? Tell them that Mike and Darren intentionally stole.

Darin: No, no, no.

Mike: Their Otis elevator bit.

Darin: No.

Mike: And, are making millions off of it. And that they should have. They should go to irritable dad syndrome.com. logic complaint, wworld wide Web, worldwide web dot irritable dead syndrome.com.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: On Facebook, on the tick tock. On, Instagram. On x. Like x.

Darin: But no, I. Seriously, I was like, although my blood or my face just got all flushed, I'm like, oh, my God, after all this time, we have been doing this thing on our show that they did probably 20 years ago.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And again, it was unintentional. I am sorry. And we're not going to steal, that material from you anymore.

Mike: I came up with a line the other day, literally a few days ago.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: And I thought it was the best line I've ever come up with. And I was excited to do it on the show, find a way to. To get it into the show.

Darin: Mm

Mike: And I was scrolling through the stuff last night, and I came across it. It's a Stephen Wright line. And I realized I was gonna say I wanted Nobel peace prize so much.

Darin: I'd kill for one. Yeah.

Mike: I was gonna bring that to the show.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: Like, dig me. It was gonna be the title of an episode. I, was gonna make it the video. It was gonna be perfect.

Darin: There was one time I'd said the perfect stocking stuffer was a cutoff foot. Yeah. That was a Mitch Hedberg bit. Okay, right. Mitch Hedberg did that one.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And then, when I do stand up, I used to do this bit where I said, hey, you guys like impressions? And people say, yeah. And I'm like, yeah, I do, too. I think they're hilarious.

Mike: Yeah. Ah.

Darin: And then I would never do impressions. and they thought that was funny. Brad Garrett from everybody loves Raymond back when he did stand up.

Mike: Did he?

Darin: You guys like impressions? Boy, I wish I knew some.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And then he. And I thought mine was close enough to his, even though his was 20 years before mine. I stopped doing that.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: Yeah. So. Because I don't want people to think that I steal my stuff.

Mike: Yeah. Did you. So, as far as comedians stealing stuff, you seen. You've seen the Joe Rogan versus. Is it Carlos Mancia? No.

Darin: no, I don't.

Mike: Oh, my God. Go on YouTube and look that up. I pretty sure it's. Carlos Mincilla was known to steal jokes from other comedians. Okay, what's, it. Mitzi. Mitzi at the comedy store.

Darin: Mitzi Shore.

Mike: Mm

Darin: Yeah. Polly Shore's mom.

Mike: Yeah. So Joe Rogan, is she really?

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: Yes.

Mike: All right. So Joe Rogan was like, yeah.

Darin: He. Paulie was on Letterman, and he was talking about how Dave used to babysit him. And Dave's like, I never babysat you.

Mike: See, Hughes's. Hughes has watched. It's uncomfortable. So all these comics, there's. There's one, right now, I can't think of his name. He. He's,

Darin: Oh, my gosh.

Mike: I can't even. There's a few comics that are famous now. one of them is Louis CK, that had some stuff stolen from him by Dennis Leary. The song.

Darin: I know the song.

Mike: He, he told that story on, Opie and Anthony. He was learning.

Darin: Stole that from Louis C. K. He.

Mike: Had a bit, and he didn't say anything about it for a long time because he said he was up and coming. Nobody knew who he was. He said, newsflash, I sucked when I was starting out, right? I had hair. And something about that makes you not funny. And it was horrible. And he said, the one bit that I had that would really kill and I would close out every night was, you know, everybody's worried about offending people. What if you had a guy that just didn't give a. And just did whatever he wanted to? And he embraced being, and he just started naming off the things I park in handicap spaces, basically the song. And he came off the stage, and Dennis Leary was, like, the guy that had kind of given him his leg up and, like, giving him some opportunities to be seen. And he said, dennis was like, that was a really good bit. That was really funny. That's really awesome. Do you mind if I, you know, he started riffing on it, started coming up with different things for it, and Louie was like, yeah, okay. Yeah, that's great. And he said, the next time, the next night or the next time he was there, Dennis Leary goes up and just starts saying, hey, what if there was a guy that embraced this and basically did his bit?

Darin: Well, it sounds like Louie gave him permission or Dennis.

Mike: Yeah, that's a gray area. Like, Dennis was asking if he could riff on it a little bit and Louis said, yeah. But he didn't think he was just gonna do his bit start to finish. Yeah. So look it up on Bob and Tom, or, I'm sorry, open Anthony.

Darin: Okay.

Mike: Dennis. Or, Louis ck goes through the whole thing. But back to Carlos Mancia. He would do the same thing with, with younger comics and they couldn't do anything about it because they were afraid I'm gonna get, you know.

Darin: Right.

Mike: Ah, fun fact, it's hard to be a comedian.

Darin: I mean, well, I mean, you know.

Mike: Everybody who has a voice and, and a hand to hold a microphone thinks they're hilarious.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: But not everyone is.

Darin: I have absolutely no idea if anybody has stolen any of my material or not.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: Because, you know, whenever I would do stand up, there would be five or six or more other guys on there.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And they could totally be doing, because I don't go to clubs three or four times a week and follow anybody to see if they do. People used to steal my jokes on Twitter all the time.

Mike: Okay. Like, repost it or they really just.

Darin: Word for word, take what I said and then post it as their tweet. Yeah, yeah. And you could, there was a website called, who's stealing.

Mike: My, is it anyway?

Darin: No, you could, who's stealing my tweets.com or something. But, yeah, there was this guy who every day would take two or three of my tweets and just write them as his own.

Mike: So.

Darin: And I just wanted to like our, you know, you know, I'm not making any money off of this and you're not making any money off.

Mike: Yes. Well, apparently the story with, with Carlos Mancia is that Joe Rogan went to Mitzi and said, hey, this guy's taking our jokes.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: And she was like, well, it sounds kind of like, and she wasn't really doing anything. So there. And this is on YouTube. You can go watch it.

Darin: Okay.

Mike: He gets up on stage while Carlos Mincy is on stage with his own microphone and says, why? You literally just stole that joke. That guy. And he points to a comedian that's out there, and things like, that guy just said that, that joke last night, I saw him in a different club. He said exactly what you said, and I've never heard you say it before. And they get in this argument back and forth. It goes on for a long time. And, Mincia has been on multiple podcasts and shows afterwards talking about that. But do you ever notice how Carlos Mincia just kind of dropped off the face of the earth?

Darin: I haven't heard from him in years.

Mike: Yes, that was it. That was the event.

Darin: well, I don't mean to, and this may not be true, but I heard Robin Williams used to steal a lot of people's stuff.

Mike: I've heard that as well.

Darin: I almost said when I was coming up, like, I used to be a new comic, and now I'm an established.

Mike: You and Billy Crystal were having this conversation in the back, whoopi, you know. No, but it wasn't to talk about it.

Darin: It was years ago, many, many, many years ago, when, I was doing comedy at a place in Tennessee, and one of the guys who was headlining that night there was talking, and he was talking about, Robin Williams stealing people's stuff right and left. I had never seen Robin Williams do somebody else's, But I heard that many, many times, and he's. He's gone. And I love Robin Williams.

Mike: Oh, yeah.

Darin: And I don't mean to drag his name through the mud, but he's one of the people I heard.

Mike: Let me m pull it. You're, not dragging him through the mud. I think part of the thing with Robin Williams is he was a master of improv comedy. He could walk out on stage and have nothing and fill an hour just talking about people in the audience and stuff. And because I saw this as an explanation for why he may have accidentally repurposed jokes, it's flown around in his head. Right. And he just. He thinks it, Right. It happens to, They were. This was on. I forget which podcast I was watching this on, but they were talking about how I was gonna do the Stephen Wright thing.

Darin: Right.

Mike: I'd heard it from him. I didn't realize I'd heard it from him. Yeah, but, you know, and then you go on the. All far opposite. I did not know this, but, George Carlin planned meticulously down to the syllable.

Darin: Yes.

Mike: His act.

Darin: Yes.

Mike: Like he, the inflection, the volume, which character he's doing each step. And if it wasn't perfect.

Darin: Yes.

Mike: He'd lose it on himself.

Darin: He was absolutely a word connoisseur.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: It was perfectly. Yes.

Mike: So now he didn't riff.

Darin: He didn't just go off the cuff.

Mike: So he's not gonna accidentally grab something. But I almost look at Rod Williams as like a lovable puppy just running through the house. And every once in a while, it's gonna, it's gonna do something.

Darin: You know, I don't remember the comic's name, but I have a friend, Tara, and she is really good friends with the stand up comedian who used to write for Louie Anderson. And he would open up for Louie Anderson. And then I want beats. Ah. some nights, if, when Louie would headline, like a club or whatever, if he was unavailable, he would step in and fill in for Louie.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: So I had asked her if she would, because I wanted to know if a lot of, if some of my jokes had any merit and I wanted to have a professional comic look. And she says, oh, he won't look at your stuff at all.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: He would not. And I said, well, that's, I wonder why. And she said, he is not going to look at your material because he doesn't want to see something get inspired and then write something that sounds kind of like something that you said. I said, okay, I can appreciate that.

Mike: Yeah. There was I, in this whole conversation, there was, there was another comedian that was like, it might m have been George Carlin, who would not watch other comedians.

Darin: Right.

Mike: For fear that that would, yeah. You know, permeate and, yeah, it's kind of like Johnny Depp. We've talked about him before. He won't watch his own movies.

Darin: No.

Mike: Which I can kind of understand.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: I don't know if you know this. I'm not Johnny Depp.

Darin: No, no, you're not. You know, I did notice that when I came in tonight, I was like, hey, wait a minute, not Johnny Depp.

Mike: But so I, for a long period of time, did not listen to the podcast. When you started editing, you took over soul editing things. Because I was terrified. Oh, my God.

Darin: I still don't understand that.

Mike: He says so many stupid things. he's gonna leave them in there and I'm gonna look like an idiot, and I can't do it. Look up the Joe Rogan Carlos Mancia thing. Because besides the actual video of him confronting Carlos live in front of an audience m is all the aftermath now we're years later. I think the last response that Carlos had on it was just last year I watched him on a podcast, and he is a. He's a broken dude. You can tell a broken dude because he keeps saying throughout the entire podcast, I'm fine. I'm fine. No, I'm good now. I'm good. I'm good. And it's like, that's exactly what a not good person says.

Darin: I will admit I did stand up a year or so ago, and I did just a bunch of, what you call one liners, kind of in the style of Mitch Hedberg or in the style of Stephen Wright.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And so I had written 1214. I can't remember how many jokes were in this five minute bit. And of all the ones that I wrote, one of them was written by my friend Steve Farrell, and another one was written by my friend Steven Hubbard.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: And I had asked both of them, can I use this joke in my bit? And they both said, totally fine. The one I, did from Steve Hubbard said, I will never get tattoos on my knuckles, especially ones that say coal and slaw. Okay, okay. So I'm like. And it got a big laugh.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And when I did my set, and then I went to the back of the club, and, everyone else was finished after the night was over with. A lot of the comics will stand around the door, kind of. I'm just kind of just standing here waiting to leave, hoping someone will walk by and say, hey, you know, I like your thing. This girl walks up to me, she goes, Cole slaw. Right? And I was like, okay, that's. Wow. That's awesome. Okay.

Mike: The.

Darin: The one joke that somebody called me out on or that. That they liked, I didn't write that one.

Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Darin: And so I, Just, like, after that, I was like, I'm not gonna use any else material again, so my apologies to Bob and Tom.

Mike: I always. I mean, we don't go see comedians very often at the local comedy place in Liberty, but when we do, I think the last time we went, there was an opener that we thought was hilarious. I cannot remember his name, but he was. He took to the stage naturally. He had, like, a command of the stage, seemed like a dude that, like, if you came up to him afterwards, he would be all over you, just, like, talking your ears up and everything. And we passed by him at the end, and I just pointed, like, man, that was awesome. And he was, like, the most meek and humble guy. He's like, oh, really? Really?

Darin: Yeah. Thank you.

Mike: I was like, I didn't expect that. I expected to be like, damn. Yeah, it was awesome. You know, he had, like, this different Persona on stage, but when he came down, he was like, I feel like I felt like giving him a hug. Yeah, dude, I'll buy you a beer.

Darin: It's like some of the comics I've met over the years were, a, little full of themselves. Right. But, hey, you know what? They had confidence. They had a ton of confidence.

Mike: You have to. To get up.

Darin: Yes. And God loved them. I mean, because, God, there are some comedians that I'm just, like, kind of jealous. Like, they just, they really have way more confidence than I do, and it shows. And then there are some who are really meek and just. They don't get it. And they're surprisingly, like, how are you that funny? But maybe it's that nervous energy that makes them that funny. I don't know.

Mike: But I don't know. I. But it is not. I mean, I haven't done it, but just from the experiences that I've had in public speaking and a little bit of exposure from this, I'm amazed at Nate Bargazzi. Bargatzi.

Darin: Oh, God.

Mike: So if you don't know, it's bargetzy. Bargetzy. Yeah, it looks like. I mean, I could see somebody saying, oh, he's just walking up on stage and he's talking about stuff. Yes. That's fun fact. That's what comedy is. It's up on stage and talking about stuff. He seems like just the guy next door complaining.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: You know, he was talking about watching the neighbor's kid, and he's like, this guy let a bomb bobcat loose in my house. It's one of the funniest lines I've ever heard from it. Just the way he says it, but.

Darin: Hm.

Mike: You. To be able to get up there and say that.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: And deliver it the way he does in, like, a folksy way. It's hard to be folksy when there's, like, 10,000 people who are staring at you. You know what I mean?

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: Well, you literally know what I mean.

Darin: Well, I've never had that many people.

Mike: You've been up on a stage, like, so. So I've seen you on stage, and I've seen you crack jokes in crowds of people.

Darin: Right.

Mike: And there's. It's a little bit different tinge to Darren. I can tell. I can tell that there's a little bit of tension there. I don't know if everybody can tell. But I can see a little bit, like, you're like, there's more skin in the game if you'd make Chris Michael laugh or not. Who gives a. It's. You know what I mean? What's he gonna do? Take his grill and go home? But, but if you live.

Darin: I live next door to her, so.

Mike: Yeah, but if you say something, you know, in, like, a stage, and it's like crickets, it's like, oh, yeah.

Darin: Ah.

Mike: that's. Yeah, okay. And it could affect the next joke.

Darin: You saw me the night that I had my first paid.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: Comedy.

Mike: Yeah. You did great.

Darin: It was sold out.

Mike: Yeah, right.

Darin: My name was on the thing.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: I was like, oh, my God. My name is on the sheet of paper. This guy, this guy, this guy. And Darren Cox.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: I didn't even care that I was at the very bottom. I didn't care. I was going on first.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: First time I got paid, it was sold out. And it's still one of the greatest nights of my life.

Mike: Yeah, yeah.

Darin: And I'll never forget, it was a lot of laughs when I did the joke about the remote control. Marriage changes people. like, you know, when I was a single guy, I used to keep my remote control on the coffee table. And now that I'm a married guy, I keep my remote control in a basket on the coffee table, because apparently I needed to stop living like an animal. And then I was just like, I want to just stand there and just, just. But then I had to keep going.

Mike: Yeah, you gotta say something else. You gave me. Thanks. Good night.

Darin: I had two more minutes or three or something like that.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And it was amazing.

Mike: I mean, you could do an Andy Kaufman and literally just leave right after that.

Darin: Or I could have done an Andy Kaufman and just stand there for the rest of the time, you know?

Mike: Thanks.

Darin: Thank you very much. And after that night, this friend of mine, he came up to me, and he looked at me, and he's, like, trying to say the words, and I'm like, yeah. And he goes, I didn't know you had it in you. I didn't know you had that in you. And I was like, cool.

Mike: So it's impressive. It's impressive because it, like I said, I hope you took that the right way. It's one thing to, like, deliver a joke to Chris Hughes standing in front of him.

Darin: No, you're exactly right.

Mike: Another, if there's, like, a sea of Chris Hughes. First of all, if you're in front of a sea of Chris Hughes.

Darin: Best audiences you could get.

Mike: Yeah, it is. But watch your back. That's all I'm saying.

Dave: You are listening to irritable dad syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast.

Mike: Ah, waka, waka, waka.

Darin: That is, without question, the funniest story I've ever heard.

Mike: We'd like to welcome our Dayton viewers. We were so excited.

Darin: We haven't been on Dayton. Yeah, I know.

Mike: We were so, like, oh, we made it big time. We were on Dayton public access. We were literally Wayne and.

Darin: Wayne and Garth. Yep. And no matter how many times I asked, I'm like, has anybody commented? no. What about people who work at the same. No.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: What about the. What about the engineers? What about the guys who roll the tape? I haven't talked to.

Mike: It changes the way. I swear, when I read about. When I read about somebody getting, like, doing something or whatever, I'm not impressed by people. If they tell me they're on tv, it's like, okay. Yeah, yeah. Or, you know, like,

Darin: But it was hilarious saying that. We've been on public access, and we followed. Yeah, we came over the guy at the show that we followed.

Mike: I don't know, the guy that. The news table. That they threw rats at him or something. And then we taught a college, class on podcast. Dude.

Darin: I wonder if any of them do a podcast.

Mike: I don't know.

Darin: Remember that woman who was just feverishly taking notes?

Mike: Yeah. I wanted to stop her. It's like writing lady. We don't know what we're talking about.

Darin: She was writing down everything. And what now? What's a marvel clothes? A, marvel close is when you finish a show, then you roll the credits, and then there's a little piece of, audio.

Mike: Jeez, how did you come up with that name? Well, the Marvel movie.

Darin: Watch the Marvel movies.

Mike: Okay. Oh, each Marvel movie does it. Yeah. And they're all connect. Yes.

Darin: Jesus.

Mike: What do you.

Darin: And why. And why is it called a cold open? Well, that's a television term for when something just comes up. Just for the. She was the one who. Can I do a podcast about how much I hate my husband? Yes, you can. You sure can. And I'd listen to that one. yeah.

Mike: So there was a dude, like, I do a podcast. I'm like, no, you're in the right place, then.

Darin: But, yeah, we taught a class on podcasting.

Mike: I don't know.

Darin: We did.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: So if you're listening to this in the year of our Lord 2024, you know what we're talking about, but let's pretend that this has stood the test of time, and somebody's listening to this in 2050, when we're in the old folks home, like, well, what were these two old masters talking about back in the day? Back in 2020, 2024, you could accidentally have a pot. You could butt dial an app and make a podcast, twelve downloads. Especially with AI. You can have the art. You could. You could have the podcast with twelve downloads.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: Before you know it, I remember calling you when we had, like, ten downloads. Like, this is it.

Darin: We had ten people listen to ten people.

Mike: Ten different people.

Darin: Oh, yeah, yeah.

Mike: And who knows how many people were in the room when they were playing it? We're gonna be millionaires.

Darin: Like, one guy was played it for, like, there's seven people in his. So it's possible. Possible. So that means that there's, like, 17 people listen.

Mike: Yeah. And they're gonna tell 17 people. And suddenly we're an MLM of podcasts spread like wildfire. We're gonna be like, Jimmy Kimmel, monkey pox. I was waiting for the phone to ring. We would get a download in California. I got a call from California.

Darin: Jimmy Kimmel wants us to come on the show right now.

Mike: Yeah, yeah. I remember the first negative coming.

Darin: I'll tell you what, we're gonna go on Bob and Tom.

Mike: One way or the other. We're gonna talk to him either in court or on the show.

Darin: I hope it's not in court.

Mike: It would be funny, maybe. Come on, guys.

Darin: So we don't have any money.

Mike: No, we don't. That's what's funny about us. We've got that dehumidifier.

Darin: Sell that, put that on the eBay.

Mike: We'll tell them it's a tribute. We've mentioned them more than they've mentioned us. They're getting free press from us. I remember the first negative comment. I was like, what could be like, I love it. I. Somebody getting mad at us for what we're talking about.

Darin: So there was the first negative comment.

Mike: Oh, what was it?

Darin: Oh, we need to make somebody laugh within the first.

Mike: We need to make somebody laugh within first two minutes. First two minutes, someone needs to be guffawing.

Darin: Right. And then there's the guy who sent me the direct message. Why do I fart when I walk?

Mike: Yeah. Okay.

Darin: And I said, I don't know. And you're like, darren's offering free medical.

Mike: Advice, mister two minute guy. Let me. Let me reenact for you the first two minutes of 99.99% of podcasts out there. Carry Carrie. Are you. Are you connected?

Darin: I think you. What. What are we doing that this week?

Mike: Yeah, this button do for all the. Oh, shit. For hello. For hello.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: Hello. 90. Most of them. I know I get podcasts recommended to me, and I have to, like, I just skip the first five minutes. It doesn't matter what it is. First five minutes, I skip and I get most of them. It's like, okay, we're ready to start. We got our guests, Felipe phillum. Felipe.

Darin: Oh, thank you.

Mike: When did you start filming?

Darin: I've been trying to get Felipe on this show for.

Mike: And their audio is always screwed up as, like, well, I got from work. Oh, that's river. It's like, what am I listening to? So I see that and I think, We're gonna be billionaires. Yeah.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: Somebody's gonna listen to this thing. And we have words. They make sentences.

Darin: I know.

Mike: And they don't destroy your ears, except what I just did.

Darin: Well, I just assumed, like, with our podcast, we have an announcer.

Dave: Hi, I'm Dave lay.

Darin: We have opening music. Hey, you wanna touch my beats? We do commercial breaks even though some of them are stolen.

Mike: We have a website that one or two people visit a year. It's great. We have merch that people come and look at and go wild about, and.

Darin: They don't buy it.

Mike: I'm gonna wear.

Darin: Listen, we've had guests on this podcast.

Mike: I'm gonna wear.

Darin: We've had people get married on this podcast.

Mike: We have. I'm gonna wear one of our shirts, sort of. We're gonna go see, hootie and the hoodie and the blowfish and, collective soul. Gonna wear one of our shirts there. Let me borrow one. I want you to count how many people stop and say, that's the funniest thing I've ever seen. That's awesome. Does it work? And they pull out their stupid little phone, and they do a little QR code, and then I get a little. Somebody came to the website, and then I go look at the merch shop and, yep. They looked at it and they walked away.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: That's best shirt they've ever seen in life.

Darin: I know.

Mike: In Vegas, I was in double digits of people coming up. Drunk people. I was excited when the drunk people were excited. I was like, oh, he's. People are gonna do anything you want accidentally buy it. Nope.

Darin: I bought four shirts and I had sex with one, of them.

Mike: The dude in Florida bought one, though. Thank you. Dude in Florida.

Darin: Thank you so much. Yeah. Hey, what happened? Gone off the rails.

Mike: We went way off the rails. Down into the woods. Have you ever watched the trailer park boys? The full series?

Darin: No.

Mike: You haven't seen where they. Okay, they were doing a drug ring, and they were running pot from northern America through the canadian border, right? And, Sebastian Bach was helping them run this ring, right? It was on a train. It was a model train on tracks going from northern America.

Darin: Sebastian.

Mike: Through the woods.

Darin: How the mighty have fallen.

Mike: Sebastian Bach would go out there and get the little tags. A pot off the choo choo train from skid row.

Darin: Sebastian Bach. What's happened to him?

Mike: I, used to watch that show in the background while I was doing other stuff. And it was the one time I stared at it, I was like, that's Sebastian Bach.

Darin: I was at a party.

Mike: Toy train.

Darin: Two years ago. I was at a party, and, a buddy of mine, I, was talking to him, and he introduced me to some of his friends, and they started talking heavy metal music. And I'm. I know a little bit about heavy metal.

Mike: Down with the axe a little bit. Yeah, yeah, you got it.

Darin: And so the question came up. What was the best hair ballad of all time?

Mike: Every rose has a thorn.

Darin: No.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: No, I said. I said, I pondered, and I said, I remember you skid row. And they're like, oh. And they were all like, drop the mic. And I was just like, you can't top that.

Mike: You're done.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: You're done.

Darin: Yeah. And it is the best hair metal song of all time.

Dave: This portion of irritable dad syndrome is brought to you by Lotus Biscoff cookies. Hi, I'm Dave lay, and I love traveling. It seems like every couple of months I get the urge to visit people and places anywhere on this great planet. And that's why I'm a big fan of Lotus Biscoff cookies. Whenever I'm flying and the stewardess asks if I want a snack, I say, hell yeah, I want a snack. And make that snack. A pack of Lotus Biscoff cookies. Since 1932, Lotus Biscoff cookies have been made with all natural ingredients. They're crunchy, and that caramelized flavor has made them the preferred choice of every major airline that serves snacks. Lotus Biscoff cookies.

Mike: Mmm.

Dave: M. Now, those are some good cookies. Back to you guys in the studio.

Darin: I wanna talk about unfrosted, and then I wanna talk about pulp fiction.

Mike: Okay, before you do that, before you do that briefly. Yeah, I'm gonna put a call out for people. I want some ideas for something for another project that we are going to work on.

Darin: Okay.

Mike: And I'm going to put the call out at the end of the episode. So if right now you're like, I'm sick of these old, bastards. I want to hear any more about what they're saying. Listen to the end.

Darin: okay. Unfrosted.

Mike: Yes.

Darin: Jerry Seinfeld's directorial debut.

Mike: Okay. Oh, he directed it.

Darin: He directed.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: That's why it's his directorial debut.

Mike: I thought it was debut. I thought it was french for his ass. I didn't know what. Hello. I didn't know what happened.

Darin: Don't listen to the critics. I've heard that the critics have, aren't crazy about the movie. We laughed our butts off.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: At this.

Mike: And, yeah, it's stupid, the style of it. Is it like waiting for Guffman?

Darin: It's set in the sixties.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And he works for Kellogg's. They catch wind that they're trying to develop a breakfast pastry.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: Okay. So they have a feeling. They hear that post that cereal company is trying to steal their thunder and market a breakfast pastry before them. So they compare it to the space race. Okay. We've got to get our ship to the moon before the Russians.

Mike: Huh?

Darin: Dean Norris, the russian guy in Kellogg's. Yeah. Yeah.

Mike: Or the guy in post, he plays.

Darin: Like, the leader of Russia. Oh, they literally. Yes.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: And they go and talk to him because they need Russia to help them with their sugar supply because El Sucre from South America is, If the only reason you watch it is for Bill Burr playing John F. Kennedy, then you're totally fine. Just watch it and then fast forward to.

Mike: Bill Burr doesn't.

Darin: Oh, yeah. Bill Burr is Kennedy, and he is a fantastic Kennedy. Okay. You all right?

Mike: No.

Darin: Hugh Graham.

Mike: Does he break into Bill Burr at.

Darin: All when he's being Kennedy or he's, got the boss.

Mike: Ah.

Darin: Here by declared this day. Pop tart day, you know? So he is fantastic as Kennedy.

Mike: Hugh Grant, I love Hugh Grant.

Darin: Is Tony the tiger. He plays Thorold Ravencroft. And he's like this shakespearean trained actor who is so pissed.

Mike: I saw a clip. Is it him? And, what's her face? Melissa McCarthy.

Darin: Melissa McCarthy, yeah. Amy Schumer's in it. Yeah.

Mike: Okay. All right.

Darin: I mean, you'll.

Mike: That was hilarious. That clip was hilarious.

Darin: Like, everybody is in this movie.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: And Jerry Sunfield's like, I don't know why they. He called, said he wanted to be in the movie.

Mike: So I thought about the movie.

Darin: You know, he is like this pissed off, shakespearean trained actor who is just sunken solo to be playing this tiger.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: Right?

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: He's hilarious.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And there are cameos. There are so many cameos.

Mike: Larry David, does he make a cameo?

Darin: No.

Mike: no.

Darin: None of the Seinfeld people, make.

Mike: You think Elaine would be. I know someplace.

Darin: But here's the thing.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: Jerry Seinfeld is not a good actor. He's just not. And he doesn't care.

Mike: No.

Darin: He just goes out and I'm just gonna read my lines like this. How come we're not. No one's eating cereal, and it's like, Christian Slater works for the milk company, right? And Christian Slater and his guys are like the mafia. and they're pissed because Kellogg's is making this product, that doesn't need milk.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: And so they're getting all heavy on the Kellogg's people, you know, threatening them and everything. I loved it. Mom came over. Mom was laughing. Jacob and Cameron. Cameron said, I don't know how many times, this is awesome. Because I told him, I said, we're gonna watch the pop tart movie. And they're like, okay. I think they were thrilled because this movie doesn't involve animals eating somebody alive, for a change of pace. So, yeah, the unfrosted was great. You just gotta watch it.

Mike: That's awesome.

Darin: Now, a few weeks ago, I told you that Jacob and I, he wanted to watch pulp fiction. We watched it up until Neil Wallace has the overdose and he has to take the. Yeah. He has to turn the syringe straight through the chest cavity into her heart. Then we had to stop it because we both had things that we had to do. So we finally picked it back up. Let's finish pulp fiction. And we're sitting down, and he had asked something about. He's like, boy, I'm glad we got past that, that one part. And I said, you know, it gets worse.

Mike: Right? He was. It does.

Darin: I'm like, oh, yeah.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: It gets much worse. How does it get worse? I can't tell you. And it did get much worse. And. Ooh, the cringing with the. With the. With. Yeah. With the gimp.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: Yeah. At the pawn shop.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And Marcellus.

Mike: Uh-huh.

Darin: Yeah. And. And here I have his dad. I think I'm a pretty good dad. I'm watching this with my son.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: We said, we watch that and then, bitch, be cool.

Mike: Like Fozzie, you know, the.

Darin: Yeah. so. And he wasn't expecting at all the scene where Butch goes back to his apartment and finds Vincent.

Mike: Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Darin: Bang, bang, bang. Yeah. And then he eats some, pop tarts, and he's like, get out of there.

Mike: What are you doing? What are you doing?

Darin: He's just stand there calmly eating these. Those are toaster pastries.

Mike: Yeah. Yeah.

Darin: Brand name. you'd think Quentin Tarantino could have afforded a little brand recognition and put some Kellogg's pop tarts in there, so.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: But Jacob loved it. He just. He loved the movie, thought it was great. And it brings up the question all these years later, because they just had the, whatever, anniversary of Shawshank, and. And I told him, us, because this year, Jacob watched, Last year, Jacob watched Shawshank. He had seen Forrest Gump. So at the oscars that year, like, the three big contenders were pulp fiction, Forrest Gump, and Shawshank redemption. And looking back now, I still would have given the Academy Award to Shawshank.

Mike: Yeah. Yeah.

Darin: Absolutely. Screenplay.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: I would have given it to pulp Fiction, but I would have given best picture to Shawshank.

Mike: Yeah. Yeah.

Darin: I think I still. Everything in my being believed that Shawshank was a better movie start to finish then all of them. M especially Forrest Gump. And I loved Forrest Gump.

Mike: Yeah. They're all great movie. Yeah. Any of these things, if you look back, in the nineties in music, look back at the music that was up in 91, and the band that should not be named their best album, you had metallica black album, right? Pearl. jam. Ten. I mean, these. It's like Nirvana, nevermind. They were all like. It's like these all came out the same year. Same, like, the same. The summer I was driving around listening to these, like, in my head. That was over a ten year period, but no, it was like, here.

Darin: Yeah. Great year from years ago. Great year for movies. Absolutely.

Mike: Yeah.

Dave: This portion of our show is brought to you by whompers. All beef footlong hot dogs. Voted best hot dog for the 7th year in a row by the National Hot Dog and Sausage association. Whompers are made from 100% pure beef with no fillers and no preservatives. Get a ruler and measure it yourself. If your hot dog isn't a foot long, they'll refund your money, guaranteed.

Darin: That's right.

Dave: Now back to the show.

Mike: Right now I'm reading the Game of Thrones series.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: in book form. That's what reading.

Darin: Reading means.

Mike: And I.

Darin: You mean you're not just reading the subtitles, you're playing the series and reading the subtitles?

Mike: Yeah. It's taken me a long time because I have to pause. I can't read that fast. Yeah, it really annoys everyone in the room. Yeah. I really wish that there was a version of Game of Thrones that I could buy that's boobless. You know what I mean? I don't have a problem because I want to watch it with Andrew. I don't have a problem with the war. I want him to see the, battle of the bastards in context.

Darin: Yes.

Mike: It's one thing, because I looked up that scene on the interwebs, and it gives me chills when Jon Snow is pulling out the sword, they're racing toward him with the swords and M. It's like, here we. And he just goes, it's the four Frodo of Game of Thrones.

Darin: It is.

Mike: And it means something if you know the context of who the guy is that he's fighting and what's happened to him all the way through. But to get that context, you got to get through all those seasons, and it's a beautiful, great show. Got boobs everywhere. I mean, Oppenheimer.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: Was very uncomfortable. I did not expect. That was stealth. Boobs came in an Oppenheimer and, like, made. I was like, you didn't really need. You can just have a disclaimer. Have, who's the guy? morpheus or somebody come out, walk out and say, oppenheimer was a. Had multiple sexual flings.

Darin: Right.

Mike: that was happening in the background.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: Let's get back to the bomb.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: You know, you don't have to just have that version. And I was reading, as I'm reading, I remember these scenes in the show where there's boobs flying everywhere.

Darin: Yep.

Mike: They weren't in the book. Now, there's a lot of sex in the book. Not nearly as much as what's in the show. Tyrion is. Tyrion Lannister is getting it in, like, the first episode.

Darin: Yes. That's the only episode we watched with Jacob.

Mike: Yeah. Didn't happen in the book. Did not happen in the book.

Darin: Yeah. Jacob wanted to watch Game of Thrones, and Livy and I were like, yeah, okay.

Darin: And we were watching, and we remembered how violent a lot of it was. But then, yeah, there's Turin Lannister.

Mike: Just.

Darin: Just, wow. Boom. There's, like, three, four, five naked girls.

Mike: There's conversations between, like, these, you know, varys and the different people. That's important to the plot. And somebody's banging somebody in the background. Blurred out in the background. Just like, why is that?

Darin: Don't do that again. Do not do that again, please.

Mike: Good Lord.

Darin: I've got washed my brain with bleach.

Mike: There's gotta be a version of it where they just. I'm not a prude. I just want to watch it with my kid.

Darin: I understand. I do understand. We got.

Mike: We got through Terminator. The first Terminator. Because I knew what was coming.

Darin: That's what she said.

Mike: Mm I, was like. It's literally. Literally, it's like, oh, they're going to the hotel room. Okay, close your eyes. Fast forward. Okay.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: What happened? You didn't. Dude, they made a kid. Now we're back to Terminator land. You know, if we watch Titanic, I know there's a part where she's like, draw me like your french, whether you're french horses. What are they? Yeah, whatever. And they. We will fast forward, and then, boom, there's the old lady again.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: And we're back to the boat sinking.

Darin: Mm

Mike: I can't do that with Game of Thrones.

Darin: No.

Mike: Randomly, you'll be a dragon. Like.

Darin: And then shooting.

Mike: All of a sudden, there's a boy. Yeah, there's a. There's.

Darin: It's like a woman on the dragon. Why you on the dragon?

Mike: It's like the movie airplane. I want to watch it. But there's that scene where everything's going crazy and the boing, boing, boing just runs on there.

Darin: What? What happened? I wasn't expecting that at all.

Mike: No.

Dave: This portion of irritable dead syndrome is brought to you by Mister Bubble, the bath time soap that makes getting clean as much fun as getting dirty. Now back to the show.

Darin: We're recording this episode on May 7.

Mike: Yes.

Darin: Okay. So two or three days ago, Libby and I took the boys out. We went to the Art Museum of Cincinnati. We took my mom to the art museum. I don't know if you've been to the Cincinnati Art Museum.

Mike: Yes.

Darin: It's really cool.

Mike: Pretty cool.

Darin: Okay.

Mike: That's the hall of justice, or. No, that's the science museum.

Darin: That's the. No, that's the history museum.

Mike: History Museum.

Darin: History Museum is the hall of justice.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: So we went to the Cincinnati Art Museum.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: Had a great time.

Mike: Yeah. The.

Darin: The boys have learned from me that when we go through the modern art exhibit and when you see the painting, that's solid yellow except for the splotch of black in the middle. And they are going on this thing. It's a good thing there's the black in the middle, because that differentiates man's look on life with the heart and the soul of the, the construction of the. And they're trying to evaluate what this painting means.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And then they finally just like, who are we kidding? It doesn't mean anything.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: So we got to the end. If you're an art major and I'm pissing you off, suck it, because. I'm sorry, but there's the sections of the museum that I call the. I can do that part of the museum.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: If I can do it, it doesn't belong in the Cincinnati Museum of Art. So we went to the art.

Mike: I agree. I understand the spirit of why you're saying that. Yes.

Darin: A yellow painting with a black splotch in the middle.

Darin: Come on.

Mike: Yeah. Pac man, that's.

Darin: Come on. Yeah. I'm sorry, but come on.

Mike: Yes.

Darin: So we did that.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And we, we went to lunch, and then later that night, it was Star Wars Day. Okay. We went to this arcade. There's a place called Arcade Legacy. I don't know.

Mike: I've heard of it. I haven't been.

Darin: Arcade legacy is the bomb. It had. You can play dig dug. You can play. No, you didn't have dig dug. They had.

Mike: Well, then I'm not going, Hubert.

Darin: Okay, Miss Pac man. My jam was Miss Pac man.

Mike: Really?

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: You pay $5 for an hour.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: Forget all these pinball games. I still don't understand pinball.

Mike: I gotten into pinball.

Darin: Yeah. I was like, I liked pinball. But, I mean, even the best player, there's no. You know when the ball goes straight down and you. There's. There's no stopping that.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: So you could lose. And it'd be no fault of your own completely. But we're at this arcade, and it's just awesome. There's a guy, and he is dressed like an x wing fighter pilot.

Mike: Okay. From Star Rebel alliance. Yeah.

Darin: And I had to hold Libby back because I'm like, well, she's married, dude. You're not taking my girl. All right. And he's just walking around all night.

Mike: Hurt her. I'm, an x wing fighter pilot.

Darin: Okay. Yeah. And I was gonna say, because, you know, it's Star Wars Day. I don't know if you wore a Star Wars t shirt.

Mike: No.

Darin: I don't know if you told anybody. Made a force.

Mike: Usually I do the required things of changing the. The thing on my facebook to Millennium Falcon.

Darin: Right, right.

Mike: And I'll make a wookiee joke. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And. But I didn't do any of that stuff. Not, I didn't do any of it. I didn't even let it pass, and I didn't even. Because you get a second chance. You get revenge of the fifth, revenge of the Sith.

Darin: Yes.

Mike: Right after I didn't anything that day.

Darin: Yeah. But honestly, Star wars has just really lost a lot of its appeal for me.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And I hate to say that, because growing up in the seventies, Star wars was the. I ate, slept, and breathed Star wars. All I wanted for Christmas, for my birthday, for anything were the Star wars figures, were the toys. Okay. I couldn't get enough of the movies. I don't know how. In the seventies, I saw it three or four times at the theater because we went to Bristol to see it. We lived in Virginia. It took, like, I don't know, 45 minutes to get to the theater. I don't know how I saw it so many times in the theater. But that's the only way you could see something over and over again is you had to keep going to theater.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: They didn't have vhs tapes back then.

Mike: Yeah. It was like $4 back then.

Darin: Yeah. So, I mean, I saw that. An empire and return of the Jedi at all, at least two or three times in the theater.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And it was just. It was just a huge part of my life, and now I'm just like, whatever. I didn't see Ahsoka. I don't see the rogue one spin off tv show. I watched, like, two episodes.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And no one.

Mike: It look like it was gonna be good. I fell out of the Marvel thing the same time I fell out of Star wars.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: It's like, yeah. And you know what? In the midst of the Marvel and Star wars stuff, I thought, this is gonna go on forever. It's gonna be awesome forever. I hope it never dies down. And it didn't really. I just kind of, like, I got tired of it.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: You know?

Darin: I know. I didn't like Obi Wan. The Mandalorian, I liked.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: boba Fett.

Mike: But we haven't finished watching. I haven't watched the second season or whatever. One of them ends with Luke coming in.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: And then there's another season after that I haven't watched.

Darin: Well, spoiler alert. The Boba Fett series. I could give a about until Mandalorian comes in. Then I liked it.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: Because I dig the Mandalorian.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: But I don't know what's. Is, it something with me? I don't know. They just. I think they just did too much too fast.

Mike: Back in the day, I loved Star wars, but I didn't like it as much as other things. I always got into the wrong thing at the wrong time.

Darin: How so?

Mike: I, when everybody was everybody kung fu fighting every, when everybody went in video games, when everybody went Super Nintendo, I went Sega Genesis. And I know there's a whole Sega Genesis crowd and everything, but come on, you guys all wish you had a Super Nintendo. I was big into the GI Joe figures. I didn't like the Star wars figures that much because they, they couldn't bend. They. Let's list all.

Darin: Well, they did.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: They didn't bend at the elbow. You're right.

Mike: Let's be serious. The Star wars figures kind of sucked and the vehicles sucked because they had to make them for these characters.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: I would put my Gi Joe characters in my Star wars stuff.

Darin: Did you ever watch the toys that made us on Netflix?

Mike: Now you've talked about it, but I will say.

Darin: So good.

Mike: I will say Star wars toys related. I do remember the Christmas that I got the Ewok village. I thought we were rich.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: When that was under, I was like, I did not, I'm sorry. I didn't know that we were this wealthy. I didn't know that there were horses out here on our farm. You know, just like smoking cigars and tossing dollar bills in the fireplace, lighting them with 100. We have the Ewok village.

Mike: Which probably cost $20, but back in the eighties, a lot of money. That was about a $1,000. Yeah, but I didn't. I like the Gi Joe. I like the genesis. When the, when the Nintendo, I was supposed to be in the super Nintendo, I was, I was always on the wrong side of things, like the cool thing. I, And it wasn't like I was being, trying to be counterculture and that. I was really cool, and it was just, I was a stupid. Yeah, I didn't know what I was doing.

Darin: What you liked. Yeah.

Mike: Anyway, but, yeah. Marvel. I never got into comic books. I. The only ones I really, I did, I read a few Spider Man.

Mike: But I like, there were, there were like Looney Tunes comic books. Do you remember that? Like Bugs Bunny. I read all those in television. Yeah. And television was the, it was pretty, that was pretty badass.

Darin: Yeah. I had the Atari 2600, Atari 26.

Mike: I just learned how to connect all my old geezer stuff. Yeah. Commodore 64 and the old Nintendo to the computer upstairs to stream shut. So, I may. On the, rock hardly.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: Start playing those olden old.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: I'm talking, like, what's grandpa playing right now?

Darin: Well, my, friends, he found his 2600.

Mike: Mm

Darin: And then his wife still had her little itty bitty four x three tv set that she had in college.

Mike: Oh, yeah.

Darin: And the 2600 hooked up to that tv still worked.

Mike: Oh, yeah.

Darin: And the kids were losing their mind playing the Atari 26.

Mike: Oh, yeah.

Darin: Pong, asteroids, pitfall. God, I could play pitfall all day. I love playing PF.

Mike: You can win pitfall. No, you can beat it. You could. There is an end to pitfall.

Darin: I didn't know that.

Mike: I didn't either. Yeah, I watched a guy do it on, on the youtubes a couple years ago. I was like. They said pitfall completed. Like, what the hell are you talking about? That's like, no, it doesn't. Went into a black hole and came out again. You don't. You can't do that.

Darin: It's.

Mike: Can't. You can't finish pitfall. There's an end. You get the last treasure. Huh?

Darin: Huh?

Mike: I did not know that pitfall two had an end. You have, Tony the tiger, and you're. It's Tony the tiger. They called him something else. Like Felix the feral cat. That's Tony the tiger.

Darin: Right.

Mike: And you're running through there, and you're getting treasures that fall too.

Darin: Yeah, I don't remember that at all.

Mike: They had. There's a bunch of pitfalls.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: Pitfall one and two are the only ones that really count.

Darin: I remember Atari had, you're inside a castle, and you went from room to room.

Mike: Adventure.

Darin: Adventure.

Mike: Yeah, you get a dragon.

Darin: You get, like, a dragon was, like, the lumpiest box.

Mike: Yeah. But you're a little square with an arrow when you get the sword and.

Darin: You could grab the bridge. Yeah, you can carry the bridge all through the castle. And then if you take it into a. It's like the mystery.

Mike: Yes.

Darin: You take the bridge into this room and put it up to the top, and then that takes you to a secret room that you can't get through unless you go through the invisible bridge thing or whatever. I remember thinking that was the most badass thing of all time. And I completed adventure, and I remember just standing up. Whoo.

Mike: I'm out the band. Yeah. Whoo. I had Indiana, Jones, the raiders of the Lost Ark game on 2600. I think that's part of the reason I am the way I am. No, they didn't have any of the good stuff. It was. It had, like, that thing, but it's basically, you run around and people do things, and you grab this sprite, and you put it on this other sprite, and it does a thing. I.

Darin: Wait, so. So you grab a sprite?

Mike: Yes.

Darin: And you put it on another sprite.

Mike: And it does a thing. Literally did a thing.

Darin: Wow.

Mike: I've read a walkthrough, and I'm like, there's no way anybody could figure, this out.

Mike: Messed me up.

Darin: Now, did you have the ET game?

Mike: I did, and I liked it. I liked. Well, I got it at the same time I got the raiders of Lost Ark.

Darin: Okay.

Mike: So I think that's part of the reason why I like the ET game. Cause I could actually beat that game.

Darin: I want to see the documentary. I want to see the documentary about them burying it.

Mike: I think it buried a lot.

Darin: Thousand of them out in a landfill.

Mike: It gets a lot of unwarranted hate. The worst game on the 2600 back in the day, was Pac man. The documentaries claim et is what caused the video game crash of 83. I think it was Pac man because you had Pac man in the arcade, but then when you have it at home, it was like brown and blue, and Pac man was this orange thing going, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam. The maze was different, and it, like, played a sound when each stage started that made your dogs in the other room. All of a sudden, a dog would run out and start chasing his tails. Like, makes that weird.

Darin: Oh, you're messing with a dog again.

Mike: And, you know, there wasn't a lot of streamers back then that didn't exist. There wasn't media.

Darin: Right.

Mike: It was just like, articles and stuff. And I remember read a couple articles in reviews. people a little bit miffed that this doesn't look anything like. I know people wanted the arcade.

Darin: I was so excited that you could get Pac man now and play it in your home.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: And I was like, this ain't Pac man.

Mike: No, he was eating, like, rat turds. He was like. They were like, little lines, but.

Darin: And they were. I remember because the game, when you go to the arcade, Pac man. Eight dots, he did. Okay, he. They're dots. Yeah, right. the Atari called them video wafers.

Mike: No, these were lines. This is back in the eighties, Pac man was doing some.

Darin: There was this kid in my elementary school goes, actually, they're video Wafers. Like Chris. Yeah, it wasn't. It wasn't Chris Hughes. It was another. This is elementary school. Long before I met Chris Kids.

Mike: We had redditors back before Reddit existed.

Darin: Shut your mouth and go home. Actually, there.

Mike: But, no, I didn't. I did not think ET was the worst game. I thought it was okay for a 2600 game.

Dave: It's time now for the Kroger story of the Week.

Darin: Libby went Grocery shopping last weekend. I always do the Shopping. But Libby, who's a sweetheart, and I love her to death. She's like, you always go to the store. I'm going to go to the store for you. I'm going to go to the store this week and give you a break or whatever. Which was sweet. and she comes home like, did you get a story of the week? Did you talk to anybody? No. I'm like, what?

Mike: That's why you go to.

Darin: That's why you go to Kroger.

Mike: That's what you go there.

Darin: Anyway, she bought a jar of what's called Hoisin sauce. You use it.

Mike: Bless you.

Darin: Yeah. It's on the same aisle as the soy sauce for if you're having chinese food or style.

Mike: fried aisle every time. I love that aisle.

Darin: Okay. So she bought a bottle of hoisin sauce. It did not make it home.

Mike: Is it made of poison berries?

Darin: I don't know.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: I'm not prepared for follow up questions. It didn't make it home. So we looked all through the car. We looked to see if it had fallen out in the driveway. Couldn't find it. We assumed that it must not have gotten bagged.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: So I went by Kroger, and there is a manager there. His name is Vaughn.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: And, Vaughn has, sunglasses. Well, he. Where he has the tinted, glasses.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: And he's seen me. We've talked several times. And I walked up to him and I said, Do you have, like, a place where people buy things and then they accidentally don't bring them back? Because my wife bottled bottle of this hoisin sauce. I got some off the shelf.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: But it didn't make it home. He says, was that the only thing that you. That you didn't get? And I said, yeah. He goes, just, we're good. Take it. And he says, I believe you. He says, it happens all the time. He says, people will buy things, and they either leave them in the cart or whatever. And so it says, yeah, we're good.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: Because he trusts me.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: So that's awesome. So, Vaughn, thank you. You get the customer service award of the week.

Dave: This has been the Kroger story of the week.

Darin: And there's an update on TJ Maxx.

Mike: Okay.

Darin: Okay. The nasty sticky pants at TJ Maxx. My mom went back to TJ Maxx. She had found her receipt.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: They gave her her money back for the pants.

Mike: Nice.

Darin: It wasn't easy, but they did give her her money back.

Mike: Okay, so that's awesome. So, yeah, a nice ending to the.

Darin: Story could have been smoother.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: Still, they refunded her money.

Mike: That's awesome.

Darin: There you go.

Mike: Okay, so the announcement that I want to make.

Darin: Mike has an announcement.

Mike: I want to. We. Darren and I are talking about a new project, a new show, a, different style than what we're doing now. It's going to be based around people on the verge of making a major decision. And I just to give you a flavor of it, one of the early episodes we're talking about, I have a friend of mine that spent a large amount of money on a broken guitar.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: but what. How it became broken and the story behind it, it means a lot to him.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: But really what it came down to, one way of looking at it, is, I'm spending thousands of dollars on a smashed guitar. Should I do it? And my advice was, yes, you. Absolutely.

Darin: Absolutely. Yeah.

Mike: I agree with you. Yeah. So the new project is we want to find those stories, find people that are about to make those decisions, hopefully talk to them before they do it.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: And then get recaps. We don't know exactly what it's going to look like. It's not going to be like a weekly thing. This will be. It's going to take a lot of work to do.

Darin: Right.

Mike: So what you can do, listening to this, if you were on the verge of a major decision or something like that, let us know.

Darin: An investment, you're looking to take another job?

Mike: I've always wanted to take this. We're looking for stuff like, I've always wanted to fly to Australia, but that's stupid expensive, and I don't know if I should do it. Talk to us. Possible ideas for this are called, you know, effort or just buy the tickets.

Darin: Make up your mind.

Mike: Make up your mind. Whatever. We want to be a part of that with Mike and Darren, and we want to talk about, you know, the aftermath with you. Was it the right decision? All those type of things.

Darin: Because if there's one thing Mike and I are good at, we're great making decisions.

Mike: Well, we have talked about this on prior podcasts. I've talked about wanting to be a concert concierge.

Darin: Yes.

Mike: the same friend neglected to go to a rush concert with me.

Darin: Yeah.

Mike: Then Neil Peart died, ended up being their last show. That was almost ten years ago.

Darin: That was their last tour.

Mike: Their last. Yeah, their last tour. Thank you. Yeah, that was almost ten years ago. We still talk about it. We still. A couple of beers in and be like, I can't believe I didn't go to that show.

Darin: I got a buddy should have driven.

Mike: To me and dragged me to the show.

Darin: I got a friend who still apologizes that he didn't go see Johnny cash.

Mike: Yeah.

Darin: With me. Yeah, I didn't go because I wasn't gonna drive to Knoxville all by myself.

Mike: So these are the kind of stories. Yeah. If you have the story, if you know someone has a story, get in contact with us. By now, you should know how to get in contact with us.

Darin: Yep.

Mike: Follow us on Facebook. You can message us there. Go to irritable dad syndrome.com. you can message us there. There's an email there. just send us your stories. And, we're looking for stories for our first few episodes.

Darin: Yeah. Very good. Thank you.

Mike: I didn't even plan that out.

Darin: Guys, we are going to go. We want you to go to irritabledad syndrome.com. and, you can listen to every episode we have. If you want to join Patreon, you can do that.

Mike: And, you can hover over items in the store, pretend you're gonna buy it, get me excited, and then not buy, it.

Darin: Yeah, yeah. Or you could buy it.

Mike: You could buy it.

Darin: Would it kill you to buy a damn shirt? I don't think so. Yeah, I don't think so.

Mike: They're funny. People will talk to you about our shirt.

Darin: That's right.

Mike: That's a guarantee that we will make to you.

Darin: Yep.

Mike: People will ask you about it.

Darin: They will. You will be the envy of all your loser friends.

Mike: If you're a shut in and you're like, how do I meet people? Buy one of our shirts and walk outside.

Darin: Yeah, absolutely. We're gonna go. We hope to see you next week on irritable dad syndrome.

Dave: Irritable dad syndrome is a Mike Odal Darren Cox production.

Darin: Stump Woodley said, I'll be watching heat of the night reruns here pretty soon, cuz I'm so old. Yeah, yeah. Carol O'Connor, he's good actor. I always got into fun fact. He was also on a little show called on the Family. He was on a comedy.

Mike: What you're saying is we're hacks. Not intentional, unintentional hacks.

Darin: Exactly. I didn't mean to. You know what I heard when I heard that you two sucked compared to fish.

Mike: They do? Yeah.

Mike: I don't know what happened to the rundown?

Darin: I know what happened. The rundown. Sit right there. We haven't gotten to it yet.