IDS #240 - Polar Bears at a Funeral

Being nice releases endorphins in your brain, study shows

>> Darin: I'm gonna start.

>> Mike: Okay. Ah, hold on, hold on. Yeah.

>> Darin: Turn off your thing, please. Will you please turn off your thing, Mike? Thank you. That's nice.

>> Mike: That's nice. See how. See, see what that's like, being nice. Do you see what that's like? Do you feel pleasant now?

>> Darin: Yeah. Me no know how that feel. Being nice.

>> Mike: Did endorphins release in your brain?

>> Darin: Yeah, I think so. Yeah.


Welcome to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast

>> Mike: All right, let's start the show. I think we just got the cold hope. Go. Hit it.

>> Darin: Don't call me stupid. Oh, right. To call you stupid would be an.

>> Mike: Insult to stupid people.

>> Dave: Welcome to Irritable Dad Syndrome. Do not listen while operating heavy machinery. That's right. Here are your hosts, Mike and Darren.

>> Darin: Hi, I'm Darren.

>> Mike: I am, Mike.

>> Darin: Welcome to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast. This is episode 240 and you are in for a treat.

>> Mike: Tonight we are gonna talk about my favorite fat ass.

>> Darin: Mike went to the gym, you squatted and what happened?

>> Mike: Pants blew apart. It's glorious.

>> Darin: We're going to talk about that. And I had a friend of mine who I haven't Talked to since 8th grade reach out and find me. And it was the wildest thing, it's the wildest thing ever.

>> Mike: Welcome to the show. You know what I was doing in 8th grade?

>> Darin: What's that?

>> Mike: I was trying to find the right hair gel. I was a spiky haired hair gel kid.

>> Darin: Uh-huh.

>> Mike: And I remember my favorite, the ultimate was L'Oreal hair gel.

>> Darin: I used the mousse with the, with the kangaroo on it, the Aussie moose.

>> Mike: The moose always pissed me off because it just, it's like, it was like a foamy, mousse. Mousse.

>> Darin: Yeah, a mousse. Uh-huh.

>> Mike: And I liked the gel.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: And I did the gel thing all through high school, college and my friends in college for the first, like for months were like, can you stop putting gel in your hair? You're walking around with like a frickin candy coating on your head.

>> Darin: Now, did you have the mullet? Did you have long hair in the back?

>> Mike: I did not.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: well, when I was in eighth grade, I did have the hair coming down like a little bit, but just like an inch or two.

>> Darin: Because for a long time I had long hair. Long. Long on top, long on the back. And it started thinning in my 20s and that's when I grew the long ass mullet. Now, mullets were the style at the time. Yeah, they were honestly the style at the time I cut my mullet before I was the ridicule of the world. And, I'll post pictures of the mullet. I don't care. I love to share those. But in eighth grade is when I started growing my hair long for, like, the first time. Yeah, I had long bangs and long hair, and my hair did. Absolutely. Two bald guys talking about when they had hair. Well, this is the perfect, perfect podcast.

>> Mike: And Mel Gibson back in the day had the mullet, like, the.

>> Darin: The best hair. Oh, my God.

>> Mike: The popularity of the mullet kind of followed the popularity of Mel Gibson. I mean, it kind of. It trailed pretty well there.

>> Darin: Not the same time. Yeah, but, yeah, so I had the. My hair did absolutely nothing. So I would put, mousse or gel or whatever. Had a blow dryer. I had my own blow dryer that.

>> Mike: Was going to go. Did you have a blow dryer? I, did, but I didn't use it.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Yeah, I didn't use it.

>> Darin: Then why did you have one Mike?

>> Mike: Because it was in the house. I smell it was in the house.

>> Darin: My mom used a blow dryer.

>> Mike: Blow dryer. I didn't use it, though.

>> Darin: It's nothing to be ashamed of.

>> Mike: I didn't. I. I would. I would.

>> Darin: But. Yeah, so when I use it now, when I dried that mullet, I would just. Just turn the. Oh, God. This is an audio. Yeah, just brush it out. It was great.

>> Mike: Darren, is doing a nearly pornographic action with his hand near his head, and I'm very uncomfortable at this point.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: so we're two bald guys in a basement talking about crap. If that's not what you wanted to listen to, then you're listening to the wrong show.


Out of nowhere, I get this Facebook friend request from this friend

>> Darin: That's right.

>> Mike: But you've already got this far, so m. You must like something.

>> Darin: Yeah, but. Yeah, so here's the thing. Out of nowhere, I get this Facebook friend request from this friend of mine who I believe the last time I saw him had to have been eighth grade when I lived in Virginia. Guy's name is Jack. And I get this friend request. I'm like, holy crap, this can't be. So I send a direct message. Before I accept it, I'm like, yeah, this is a name I haven't heard of in probably 40 years. Close. I said, are you the Jack that I knew from when I went to school in Virginia? And he replied it. He says, yeah, that's me.

>> Mike: You started vetting him?

>> Darin: Yeah. Yeah, I did. Well, I. I don't know what happened that made him. He says, for some reason, out of the blue, I was thinking about you, and I think, I wonder, what if he's doing anything. And he says, I searched you up on Facebook and that was you. And here we are. So we're chatting, and the question came up of, how are things? What's been going on? And I thought, where do you pick up when the last time you saw somebody was, like, eighth grade. I'm like, well, I, finally, lost my virginity. Looks like you did, too.

>> Mike: How about Star wars coming back, huh?

>> Darin: Return of the Jedi was something. Yeah.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Did you like 1984 by Van Halen as much as I did?

>> Mike: Are you pissed the Ewoks never came back? They had a gold mine there with the Muppets. They did what?

>> Darin: Yeah, but it was. What? So this friend of mine, it's like, okay, so I have two kids. He's got two kids and four grandkids. He's already retired.

>> Mike: Oh, my Lord.

>> Darin: He got himself one of them sweet jobs that allows you to retire after 30 years of service.

>> Mike: Yeah, okay.

>> Darin: I'm like, dude, congratulations. But I tell you what, it was awesome.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Talking to this guy again. And we're gonna keep in touch. Yeah.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: So eighth grade.

>> Mike: Yeah. My retirement is going to be like, you see the. At the end of Ferris Bueller's Day off, like, you go through the credits, and then Ferris is in his bathrobe.

>> Darin: What are you doing?

>> Mike: You're still here?

>> Darin: Why are you still here? Yeah, go home.

>> Mike: That's what. My boss is gonna just walk in, like, what are you doing? We thought you died weeks, ago. You just won't go home. Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah.


Dave Lay recommends Just Heels for top and bottom pieces of bread

>> Dave: This portion of our show is brought to you by Just Heels. How many times have you opened a loaf of bread only to discover that your two favorite pieces, the top and bottom, have already been eaten? I'm Dave Lay. Like, this happens to me all the time. That's why I buy this revolutionary product, Just Heels. Just Heels is exactly that. A bag full of heels, only top and bottom pieces of bread. And it's quite delicious. So stop the bickering and madness at your home and buy Just Heels so everyone can enjoy that top and bottom bread goodness.

>> Mike: Mmm.

>> Dave: M Heels.


Mike is starting a new exercise routine to lose weight

Now back to the show.

>> Mike: How things.

>> Darin: Things are going good. It's starting to warm up a little bit. It was 21 degrees here.

>> Mike: Warm up a little.

>> Darin: Yeah. It was 17 last week. Yep. I've turned to my dad. Boy, it's supposed to be 16 tomorrow. Wild turkeys are coming down off the mountain, which means it's Gonna snow. Yeah, Dad, I heard it's gonna snow watching the news.

>> Mike: So I'm starting a new exercise routine.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: All right. I've done the same thing for years, and I've wanted to switch things up. I'm doing the Schwarzenegger. The pumpkin.

>> Darin: Yeah. Huh?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: So you. You load this thing in, and you get to choose. Do you want muscles or do you want to lose weight?

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: And I said yes. And. But, it makes you choose one or the other.

>> Darin: Right?

>> Mike: I chose lose weight.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: So I've been doing. I've been doing the thing.

>> Darin: I don't. I honestly don't think you could get any muscle. Any more muscles than you got.

>> Mike: Here's the.

>> Darin: Dude, you're the arm. Mike's arms are jacked.

>> Mike: That's the only place that muscle is in my body. I'm like a jello person with. With arms. With, like. It's pretty hideous. So I start this routine. Now, the new thing with this is it has a warm up, which I haven't had since I took the Taekwondo with Andrew back in the day. Do you remember those days? I do.

>> Darin: That's when I first met you. You and Andrew were doing the Taekwondo.

>> Mike: I was relatively fit.

>> Darin: I had.

>> Mike: I ran a half marathon. I damn near ran a full marathon. I walked most of it after I blew up my knee.

>> Darin: They didn't tell you to stop.

>> Mike: They didn't. Yeah. The point is, is that I thought I was in awesome shape. I was in awesome shape compared to how I am now. I was great. And then Bess is like, hey, they do the Taekwondo down at the ymca. that would be fun for you and Andrew to do.

>> Darin: I love how you put the. The ymca.

>> Mike: Yeah. So, you know, Andrew is a little kid at this point. I was like, hey, buddy, do you want to. How to beat ass? Like, beat. Beat people to death?

>> Darin: Names.

>> Mike: Yeah. Destroy them.

>> Darin: Yes. Take away everything they've ever hoped for and dreams.

>> Mike: He said, daddy, you're scaring me. And Beth said, yeah, you're coming on a little too strong. And she said, just go do something and I'll talk to Andy. Like, put him in a body bag. Yeah. Somehow we ended up in the Taekwondo. And I walked in there with an attitude. I'm like, I. This is. What are you gonna do? Like, a little. A few jumping jacks, a couple of push ups.

>> Darin: I. I have a feeling that you walk into most things with an attitude.

>> Mike: I do.

>> Darin: Am I right?

>> Mike: I do. But I had a. What is that called?


I was a bit arrogant and I walked in there and we did the warm ups

I was a bit arrogant and I walked in there and we did the warm ups and after about five minutes I was practically in tears.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And I learned a very valuable lesson is that I was not in as good a shape as I thought I was. And then I got in good shape on that side and then I went back to the gym to try to lift and I couldn't do that anymore. So I'm trying a new thing. And the point of all this is, is that it has a warm up routine. The first few times I did this, the warm up routine was pretty much enough for me. Right. I've gotten to the point I'm on workout nine. I'm able to get through the whole thing. I go, yesterday, I have workout shorts. That's what I was wearing. I've told everyone this story and they're like, were you wearing skinny jeans? Were you wearing paper mache? No, I was wearing exercise shorts. I was wearing what you're supposed to be wearing.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: At the gym, first thing I do, I have to do 30. Count them, 30. Three sets of 10. Body weight squats.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Body weight means something very different when you're in your late 40s than it does when you're in your 20s. When you're in your 20s, it's like body weight. Squat. What are you, what are you doing?

>> Darin: Do you squat your actual body weight?

>> Mike: I do squat. My actual. I don't cut off any limbs or anything. I go down with everything and I come back up and I do it relatively fast.

>> Darin: And that's just part of the warm up.

>> Mike: It's part of the warmup.

>> Darin: Good God. So that'd be the whole routine for me.

>> Mike: I squatted down and I heard, and I looked at the people around me, not. I hope they didn't hear that. More like, who? Just their pants. Right then I felt, a bit of a frigid, frigidness about my, nether regions.

>> Darin: Slight decrease, in temperature decrease around the jewels.

>> Mike: An intense decrease in temperature.

>> Darin: Intense, Intense. Okay.

>> Mike: And I came back up. And then at that point my brain had ascertained that my buttocks were exposed. Ascertained I had underwear on.

>> Darin: I had smart for figuring it out.

>> Mike: Dark green gym shorts and bright blue underwear. I squatted again. I did.

>> Darin: No, he wore purple. He wore purple pants.

>> Mike: I squatted again because I was in denial. And the cool breeze came by. What would you do for a Klondike bar? I got a question.

>> Darin: I don't remember. what's the Hulk's name?

>> Mike: David Banner.

>> Darin: I don't Remember Bruce Banner ever wearing purple pants? But the Hulk always wore purple pants. M. Okay, go ahead.

>> Mike: It was the 70s. Purple was a dime a dozen.

>> Darin: Purple haze.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Back to the story.

>> Mike: And I came back up. And then I stood there for an extended period of time. I wretched round wretched. And it was, ah, a large tear. It went from the top of my crack all the way past ball country, up, towards the front. There's no way I can go through this workout without everybody in that gym seeing my business.

>> Darin: Even with your underwear on? Well, do you wear tidy white?

>> Mike: No, no, no, no, no. Well, I don't want them seeing my underwear, cuz I didn't know.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: I wasn't aware of skid marks being there.

>> Darin: God, those are on the inside, not the outside. Hey, well, I don't know what you do.

>> Mike: There's videos out there of the Tik Tok. If there's a video of a dude, like, doing somersaults and they. And it's. It's bad. I didn't have any. I don't want to get gross. I had none, but I know you don't. I don't want to be the guy with the split ass. Right?

>> Darin: Yeah. yeah.

>> Mike: There's children in there, for God's sake.


Darren Criss ripped his comedy pants during a gym trip

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: So I walked over to Andrew. he was on the other side of the gym. And I said, I'm, leaving. And he said, and I quote, you just got here. And I said, I just split my pants and my ass is hanging out. I'm going to go home. He grinned like I was joking. I turned around and I saw his eyes go down, and he witnessed the damage, and he laughed. And I left the gym in shame, came home, made dinner, went on with life as normal.

>> Darin: Uh-huh. And then you proceeded to share the story on social media and on your podcast.

>> Mike: I told Bess. And you saw. I mean, I shared her reaction on social media.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: My deal is I use that as an example of why I occasionally have to buy T shirts and gym shorts. I. Every time I get new gym shorts or a new T shirt to work out in, I get questioned. Don't you have enough T shirts? I do have enough T shirts, concert T shirts. But I'm not going to work out in my Billy Joel concert T shirt.

>> Darin: No, no, you're not a freak.

>> Mike: Billy Joel swole. That's free.

>> Darin: The point is, thank God you didn't.

>> Mike: Charge me for that. I really liked these shorts. These were. They had. They were Fairland High School shorts that they. The Fairland High School is where I went to high school. M. And, they were a gift. And they are split in twain.

>> Darin: Wow.

>> Mike: All betwixt.

>> Darin: So horrible.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Years ago, we were going to church, and, we're all walking in from the parking lot. I dropped my keys or I dropped something. I bent down to pick them up and my pants ripped from the crotch all the way around to between the, the old back pockets.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And what am I going to do? Not just not go to church? I mean, I guess I could have gone. You're wearing chaps and Libby and the boys are laughing so hard. M. Because I have just ripped my pants all the way up.

>> Mike: That's some stitching, too.

>> Darin: Yeah, Yeah.

>> Mike: I was dealing with, like, a poly stitch.

>> Darin: You're throwing those away. Yeah, but. And then I made it worse by saying, oh, those are my lucky pants. Those are my comedy pants.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Because when I did my first comedy, so opening up for Michael Flannery, those were the jeans that I wore. I did really well. And so those were my comedy pants. Every time I had a gig after that, I would wear my comedy pants.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: I would wash them. Right. And it's not like I had so many comedy gigs. Like, just. Darren, you wear the same gig each hundred times you perform. No. Yeah, wore them like five times.

>> Mike: But still, it's like Sinbad has his comedy outfits that he wears.

>> Darin: That's right.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And, Eddie Murphy had the red leather.

>> Darin: Yes, he did. He had the red leather.

>> Mike: And I had.

>> Darin: I had the fade. And they were like faded from the knee. They were like, that's what you want. They were intentionally faded, like from the knee up to the up the thigh.

>> Mike: Acid washed. Is there. No, they were.

>> Darin: No, they weren't stonewashed. They weren't acid washed.

>> Mike: Boys and girls, back in the 90s, they couldn't buy normal jeans. The only way you could get normal jeans is if you went to the hardware store and you got Carhartts.

>> Darin: That's right.

>> Mike: Other than that, it was like, do you want them acid washed? Stone washed? Bleach washed? Button fly, button fly. Oh, my God.

>> Darin: When I was a kid, you'd get a new fly. You'd get a new pair of jeans for Christmas. They would literally stand on their own.


My wife joined a cult. She now bakes her own sourdough bread

I mean, you had to, roll them up in a metal pipe and. And then, wash them and beat them down. Had to wash them two or three times before you could wear them.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: They were so hard.

>> Mike: Yeah, that's what she said. Nowadays, I don't even know what Happens. Oh, they're all skinny jeans. So that's why. I don't know. Because I can't. I can't wear my skin, my tank ass into them. Anywho.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: I do have a. I want to answer a question here. Stump, is asking, were those the shorts you've had since high school? No, these were purchased for me, probably. I've had them probably about. Oh, my gosh. Probably about 15 years purchased. I've been using them for about 15 years. I think that's a pretty good run.

>> Darin: I had a pair of swim trunks. They were orange. And, we were getting ready to go to the pool, and I bent down to get something, and they ripped right down the middle, too. And it. And it broke my heart because these swim trunks, I had taken to Hawaii, they'd been to Australia, God knows how many times. We took them to Myrtle, beach, and. And so many great times. And then a tear was shed. And then I threw them in the trash, and I got my blue swim trunks. And then. Yeah. So that's a great story.

>> Mike: Three years ago, m. In February, I went to C Tool. I was VIP Gold.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Like, right there in front. And I had gifts mailed to our house. And one of the gifts was an exclusive jacket. Nice. It's badass. I still have it up there.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: the armpit ripped, like, the second time I wore it. I was putting it on.

>> Darin: Uh-huh.

>> Mike: Because you can't. I mean, it's like, what? I can't call the Tool people.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: And say this one of a kind thing. You got me. I can't. Yeah, well, turns out last year, you could. They started selling them. but I was like, eh, whatever.

>> Dave: You're listening to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast.

>> Darin: My wife joined a cult. She has talked about this for a while, and I didn't think that she would officially pull the trigger and join a cult, but she did join a cult.

>> Mike: She bought Dianetics.

>> Darin: No.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: No. She now raises. Not raises. She now grows. She now bakes her own sourdough bread.

>> Mike: Oh, okay.

>> Darin: Yeah, I'm just. It's delicious.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: Okay. And she bought this right at the time when, everyone's trying to lose weight. So let's just start making sourdough bread.

>> Mike: It's a bread maker. An actual bread.

>> Darin: No, she didn't buy a bread maker. What? She did. Here's the thing.

>> Mike: She got this school. She's, like, churning butter.

>> Darin: This is close.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: This is where the cult part comes in. So she tried Making her own starter. Okay. And I know nothing about this at all, but she and my oldest son Jacob are both in this cult now where they tried making their own starter and then making their own sourdough bread, and they had no luck. So Libby went on the interwebs, and as you know, Mike. Yes. when you go on the Internet and purchase things on the Internet online, that's just only the work of the devil. Okay. So she found.

>> Mike: And Satan's playground, I think, is what the Internet is there.


The sourdough bread starter apparently is 233 years old

>> Darin: There was a woman who sold Libby a sourdough bread starter. Okay.

>> Mike: I have newt for like.

>> Darin: Yeah. A rat's tail, two hairs of a. Of a virgin sheep. Yeah.

>> Mike: A dragon tooth.

>> Darin: Yes. And so she buys this sourdough bread starter off of this woman. And it comes with this thing explaining the history of the sourdough bread starter. The sourdough bread starter, Mike, apparently is 233 years old. Okay. Now, the woman that we bought it from, she had it from her mother, and her mother bought it from a bakery. I don't know when she bought it. 1809. I don't know. But her mother fed the starter every day for 70 years.

>> Mike: Is starter a euphemism for demon? It's 233 years old. Found in the old country.

>> Darin: Exactly. It's been around for 233 years. So now that we have it. No pressure. Okay. What does the lineage die with us?

>> Mike: I go to the K. Rogers, and bread only lasts like a week. What the hell? You got something that's been around since before the country was a country.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Are you saying the recipe is that.

>> Darin: The starter is 233 years old? And I don't understand how to do this, but when you feed the starter, you have to feed it every day. You add flour and water to it, and you have to keep it in a. In a thing. and it has to, like. Occasionally it doubles. Sometimes it rises over the thing, and that's when you have to discard some of your starter. And then sometimes it will decrease. I don't.

>> Mike: I'm going to. I'm going to make a. Excuse me.

>> Darin: Excuse me. No, excuse me.

>> Mike: Excuse me. This is a safety pause.

>> Darin: I'm in the middle of a safety pause. Yeah.

>> Mike: If there's any demonologists or exorcists out there, go ahead and send us. Send us recommendations, to help Darren.

>> Darin: The bread tastes so good. It has to be sinful.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: Okay.


We have a sourdough bread starter that is going to outlive us

So your demonology and, which I even started, so the equivalent for me Is now that we have a starter. Since this woman's mother had the starter and she fed it every day for 70 years, I'm like, this is like owning a turtle. We have bought a turtle. This starter.

>> Mike: It's gonna outlive you.

>> Darin: Is going to outlive us. and then Jacob and Cameron are going to have to feed the starter.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And then their kids or whatever. It's like when we go on vacation or Chris and Mary supposed to come over and take care of the rabbit and feed our starter. To which Libby said, oh, you can hibernate it. Like, what the hell? The hell do you do that? I don't. And so Libby, I love her very much. She's lost her mind. She has made three, four giant loaves of sourdough bread in the past couple of days. Jacob ate almost the entirety of the first one. It's so good. It's really, really good.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Yeah. But today, any strange happenings around the house, any paranormal activity, but you walk.

>> Darin: Into our kitchen and there's flour everywhere and there's dough on the. It's like the forks are covered in dough remnants. And, I'm just like. And now I'm part of a, marriage that's like. Like man, woman, and sourdough bread starter.

>> Mike: It's like, you know what the next step is?

>> Darin: What's that?

>> Mike: You're gonna start to hear about how all the normal bread is.

>> Darin: Oh, we've already.

>> Mike: You know what I mean? We've already gone down that road.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Have you made sandwiches with this stuff yet?

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: That's. You're gone.

>> Darin: Yeah, I know, I know. And the plan is, you know, when Jacob goes to school tomorrow, he's. Because we have some, deli meat. He's gonna make sourdough bread sandwiches. Okay. Take to school.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: M. It's like having a hanging out with the goths.

>> Darin: Exactly. Libby's gonna get her nose pierced and get wrist tattoos. Sour on one wrist, dough on the other. Yeah, Yeah. I will say, yeah, it's delicious.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: But God love her. She. She gets so excited. She's like, look, look, that's. The bread's got holes in it.

>> Mike: You know what?

>> Darin: Crunchy on the outside. And she's poking it.

>> Mike: Hello.

>> Darin: It's soft on the inside.

>> Mike: I know.

>> Darin: I'm like, what. What are you doing?

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah. Liberal. I'll tell you. I get it every time I come up with a new recipe or a new thing to cook, that's all we're eating for weeks. It drives My family crazy. I got a. I've started following this guy on the Facebook's Drew, cooks is Drew something.

>> Darin: See the guy who winks and says, put it in your mouth.

>> Mike: Yeah, put it in your mouth. And he has amazing recipes and he has an amazing pasta bake. And I've been making that. Like the kids are starting to go. Are you. Are we making the meatball pasta thing? Like, yeah. It takes dad five minutes to make it and it's incredible. Yeah, it's amazing. And it lasts a day and a half with all you people.

>> Darin: Oh, do you know what I made that I saw on the TikToks? This lady, her thing comes up. Hello. And she said, spice up your spaghetti with. Make taco spaghetti. And all you do is you put taco seasoning in your beef and then you just put that on top of your spaghetti. You can add a couple cans of tomatoes and, and maybe a little sauce. I did that.


Libby and I made lasagna for Christmas and the family devoured it

And the family went crazy. They devoured it.

>> Mike: That sounds amazing.

>> Darin: Yeah. Usually when we make spaghetti, it's like we'll eat it, but then I end up throwing the rest of the leftovers away. No leftovers. Taco spaghetti.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And hey. Okay. A few, few weeks ago, when I have a meaning to talk about this, for Christmas, Libby and I made lasagna. Oh my God. Lagna lasagna. Holy crap.

>> Mike: Was it good?

>> Darin: Oh, it's.

>> Mike: Use cottage cheese.

>> Darin: Yeah. Really? No, no. Ricotta. You can use cottage cheese.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: But we prefer ricotta.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Okay. And here's the thing. Here is the secret. Kids, write this down.

>> Mike: Ricotta cheese is more Italian.

>> Darin: Take this from Uncle Darren. When making a lasagna, okay, you're gonna go to Kroger and or whatever grocery store is your preference, there's going to be a low fat mozzarella cheese that you can sprinkle. Don't buy the low fat mozzarella cheese. No. God, please, no.

>> Mike: You're making lasagna.

>> Darin: Get the whole fat.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Because the low fat, it doesn't melt. Okay. It gets hard, but it doesn't melt. You know what I'm saying?

>> Mike: I'm. Dude, I. Yeah, you. When I'm making.

>> Darin: Get the whole. If you can get extra fat mozzarella cheese, get that. Because you're just going to make lasagna for Christmas, right? Because that's the only time we make lasagna. But the whole fat big ass cheese in there.

>> Mike: Let me ask you a question.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Because I have this. I'm not going to ask you a question. I'm Going to tell you something and see if you agree with me because I don't know how to phrase this as a question.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: I. There's, a lot of foods that I won't eat until I've made them myself.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: I see how it's made and then I'll start eating it. And a good example of this is guacamole.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: For years I ran screaming from guacamole. It's green, it's, it's really good. Like, it's like, I don't know, it's fat, but it's a good fat.

>> Darin: I don't know what avocado is. The good fat.

>> Mike: It's a good fat. and then one day I found a recipe for guacamole dip. And I was like, I can do that. I. I always wanted to cut an avocado anyway. It seemed like a thing I wanted to do.

>> Darin: I finally learned how to do that too. Yeah.

>> Mike: And I made it. And then I was, I ate that. I ate the whole thing myself. I was like, this is amazing. I still have a little bit of a problem with other people make the guacamole, but when I make it, it's amazing. Same thing with, pumpkin pie. Or as we call it, punku pie.

>> Darin: Punko pie.

>> Mike: I make punku pie and I eat the snot out of it with heaping, heaping dollops of Cool Whip. Cool Whip.

>> Darin: Cool Whip.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: You mean Cool Whip.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Cool Whip.

>> Dave: Cool Whip.

>> Darin: Cool Whip.

>> Mike: Cool Whip, Cool Whip. But if we buy a punku pie.


Elise Jessie makes avocado guacamole on Cincinnati's comedy podcast

Uh-huh. Or if we go to a party and someone else has punku pie.

>> Darin: Hm.

>> Mike: I look at it side eyed.

>> Darin: Yeah, I don't know about that.

>> Mike: It's not as good as my pumpkin pie.

>> Darin: We've decided that we're never going to buy pumpkin pie again. Or Punku pie. And we're gonna do. Cuz Libby made a homemade pumpkin cheesecake at Thanksgiving shot.

>> Mike: What in the hell?

>> Darin: Shut up. So good. On a homemade graham cracker crust.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: You'll never eat punku pie again. Yeah. Hey. Hey. Avocados.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: So, I've got a friend, her name is Elise Jessie. She used to work at Channel 5. She was sports anchor, at, Channel 5. And she still does coverage, for the bungles. Anyway, she has this. Hey. Hey, I'm Elise, cooking with Elise on Instagram. And she was talking about making guacamole.

>> Mike: Yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: And so she cuts open the avocado and she takes her knife and, and chops it into the seed, twists it and pulls the seed right out. Sorcery. I was like, holy crap. How did you do that? Yeah. And I even backed it up and slowed it down, pulled it up carefully.

>> Mike: You chop your hand off.

>> Darin: Well, see? And so the last time I made the avocado or the guacamole, I did that. I cut it. And I have really gotten good at buying avocados. this is Cincinnati's comedy podcast, folks. I can feel it. And I'm like, this one's black on the inside. This one's perfect. Because with avocados, they're black on the inside. Yes. You've got to.

>> Mike: There's burn down the house. I would run screaming.

>> Darin: And there is a very, very, very fine line as to they're too ripe. They're perfect. They're bad.

>> Mike: Oh.

>> Darin: And you have to. Once they get that, you got to eat them that day, not the next day. They will go, yeah, yeah, that. But yeah. I was so proud of myself because I took my knife, I stuck it right there in the seat, I twisted it, and I pulled that some bitch right out. And then you squeeze the peel and the green stuff comes out of the avocado. I'm like, I'm just some, avocado making son of a mother scratcher.

>> Mike: Another good thing about the avocado is that seed. If you have a slingshot, you're prepared to defend yourself if Chris Michael comes over. Yeah, knock him right.

>> Darin: If I had that, they could take an orc out with that avocado seed.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah, yeah.


This portion of our show is brought to you by Whompers All Beef Foot Long Hot Dogs

>> Dave: This portion of our show is brought to you by Whompers All Beef Foot Long Hot Dogs. Hi, I'm Dave Lay. Having a party. Well, nothing livens up a get together like some ice cold beer, funky tunes, and a couple of packs of Whompers All Beef Footlong Hot dogs. Whompers are packed full of flavor and have no fillers or preservatives. There's no doubt about it. Whompers will turn your hot dog party into a big old hot dog party. And remember, get a ruler and measure it yourself. If your hot dog isn't a foot long, you'll get your money back, guaranteed. Back to you fellas in the studio.


Name a non Lord of the Rings character who could resist the one ring

>> Darin: Speaking of the hobbit.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: This friend of mine, Steve Hubbard. Yeah, he posted it. Wasn't his thought, but he posted it from somebody else on his Facebook page. Somebody raised a question of. Name a non Lord of the Rings character from. From like a movie Rambo, who would. Let me finish. Name a non Lord of the Rings character who could resist the power of the one ring.

>> Mike: Rambo.

>> Darin: Rambo. I'm sticking with Rambo. Would not. Okay.

>> Mike: He wouldn't.

>> Darin: The first person I thought was Captain America.

>> Mike: Oh, yeah.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: And then Luke, Skywalker. We all. We all agree.

>> Mike: Okay, okay.

>> Darin: Luke Skywalker, he never turned to the dark side.

>> Mike: No, you're right. He did not.

>> Darin: He never turned. He could have. He could have controlled the whole universe.

>> Mike: With Papa in Return of the Jedi. When he threw that lightsaber when the. When the Palpatine was like, strike him down the way.

>> Darin: It's not bad.

>> Mike: Watch it again. Watch Return. The way Luke just flings it and he looks. He looks at him like, yeah, I'll never join you. It was before that point. He's got a disdainful. Like, how dare you, pruney man flings it, huh?

>> Darin: Uh-huh.

>> Mike: It's awesome. I was never a Luke fan when I was a kid. I became a Luke fan in my later years. He seemed whiny when I.

>> Darin: Well, he's still whiny.

>> Mike: And Han Solo was the badass.

>> Darin: I know. I'm still Han Solo.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: I'm still all Han Solo all the way. Yeah. But it was funny because I. I said Captain America, and then we. Luke Skywalker. The kids said Charlie Brown. I'm like, dude, okay.

>> Mike: yeah.

>> Darin: You don't think Charlie Brown would take the ring just so he could kick loose.

>> Mike: Snoopy would take the ring before they get out of Rivendell. Yeah, he popped that thing on his paw, and he's gone, dude.

>> Darin: Out there killing the red bear.

>> Mike: Oh, yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: Rivendale.


Over Christmas break, we went to Sandbox VR. Virtual reality sandbox

I was so excited for last week because I was gonna tell you a joke, an old joke that I remembered, and I forgot all about it. And that always bothers me because I'll go home. And then, I got crap.

>> Mike: Because I was supposed to sell the joke to the thing. Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: No, because I used to work with a guy who was from Venezuela. Okay? And so we're having a meeting, and before the meeting started, one of our co workers was talking about, he, went to a funeral, and he was the pallbearer at the funeral. And I was like, oh, okay. You know, we're sorry that you had to go to funeral. Whatever. We're walking out of the meeting, my buddy from Venezuela grabs me. He goes, he's lying. And I said, what do you mean? He goes, they wouldn't have polar bears at a funeral.

>> Mike: Okay?

>> Darin: Not polar bear. Pallbearer.

>> Mike: So we do, dad jokes at our. At work. Okay. We have our production meeting we go through the whole thing, and we always end it on a dad joke.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: It's kind of a thing to get by. And I often give answers that I think are better than the actual answer.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: And yesterday was an example of that. And every. I got agreement for everyone. It was, what did the. The frog order at the fast food restaurant Ribbitz? a hoppy meal. That was my answer. I think that's funny.

>> Darin: But the.

>> Mike: But the real answer was French, flies. Hoppy meal. Everyone agrees.

>> Darin: Better.

>> Mike: The hoppy meal.

>> Darin: It's also better than rivets.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: I've been meaning to tell you this for weeks. Over Christmas break, we went to Sandbox VR.

>> Mike: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: Virtual reality sandbox. And we played a game, that was much like, Lord of the Rings. Okay. And we were. Oh, my God. I, was covered in sweat. I was losing my mind fighting these dragons and orcs and all these things coming on. And so there was four of us. Me, Libby, Jacob, and Cameron. And we chose. I can't remember the name of the game we chose, but the lady who set us up told us that it's okay. So I knew better, but I still didn't think that this is actually going to be the case. And what I'm trying to say is she said, if you choose a certain weapon, there's only two male characters and two female characters that we can have that operate it. So I wanted an axe. Okay? Jacob had already chosen an axe, and Cameron had chosen an axe also. So I was a third person. So I had to be a female. Okay, Okay. I had a female character, which I didn't think there was going to be anything about it until we walk in and we get our gloves on and our glasses on and they shut everything down and we see our VR, and then I notice that I've got, like, the biggest set of boobs. And I'm like, these are nice. Like, how am m I supposed to fight orcs and stuff when I'm seriously just, like, looking at my own boobs?

>> Mike: Yes.

>> Darin: I'm like, libby, you like. You like my boobs?

>> Mike: Did you look behind yourself? Did you have a badonkadonk?

>> Darin: You know what? I didn't have a. I thought I was gonna have a nice butt, too, but no, no, but I had some, firm, supple breasts, okay? And, Libby's like, okay, stop talking about your boobs. And Cameron's like, dad, stop. Stop talking about your boobs. Yeah, but VR was awesome. We had a blast.

>> Mike: Oh, yeah.

>> Darin: And I. I am just.

>> Mike: You cannot pass.


This documentary is really, really great. It's about the Star Wars holiday special

I am serpent of the Secret Fire, wielder of the flame of Arnor. The dark fire will not avail you.

>> Darin: Go back to the shadow shall not pass. Yeah, I'm, just screaming all these things and, And I know the people who work there, they. They do this all the time.

>> Mike: Yeah. They're going there.

>> Darin: People lose their minds and, and yell all these things from Lord of the Rings. But it was awesome.

>> Mike: Yeah, it was really, really. It's so. Yeah, we have. I mean, you saw Charlie in there with the meta.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Which the meta is a lot. It's. He's a lot more free. We have the PlayStation and you got a cord hanging out. Which it's still amazing. But you've got the cord. You're tethered to Char. The thing with the meta that blew me away was I was trying to fix it for Charlie. Down here we have it in the playroom. And for some reason it. The menu that I was trying to navigate and I couldn't figure out, I had to go upstairs to get my phone. It kept the menu in that room. And I could see it through the floor of our house. Like it was a augmented reality. You can see your house and it'll put things. So one of the games that it has for it is like zombies invading your house. You tell the game where the windows and doors are.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And then it like makes zombies try to come in and you try to shoot them.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: This thing had the wind. I was like looking at the window down there and I almost cursed in our kitchen because I was like, I've never seen anything like that before.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Amazing.

>> Darin: It's. It's a lot of fun. The Incredible Hulk will not be presented.

>> Dave: This evening.

>> Darin: Over our Christmas episode. I had mentioned that, you know, I was going to. I had plans to watch the Disturbance in the Force. Okay. It's the documentary that they made on the Star wars holiday special. Okay. I finally got around to it. Oh my God, this is a great documentary.

>> Mike: Is on the Netflix.

>> Darin: you can. Where is it? It's not on Netflix. I've got the dvd. I've got the dvd. Oh, I don't know where it's available, but it is available on streaming somewhere. This documentary is really, really great. And it explains because so many people watching it now ask, why did they do this? And the. The basic answer was, bruh. it was made in the 70s.

>> Mike: Yeah. Everybody did Christmas specials then.

>> Darin: Well, yeah, they did. Well, some of the examples were the Paul in Halloween special that had Kiss on there.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: That was hysterical.

>> Mike: Shake it up, shake it down, Move.

>> Darin: It in, move it round. Disco, baby. Donnie and Marie, had their holiday special. And then looking back at this now.

>> Mike: The Ron Jeremy Christmas Special.

>> Darin: I did not see that one. Okay. No, but I hear it was uncut. So they explained that back in the 70s, they hired people to produce a show. Like ones who produced the musicals or the, the tv. The TV specials, like the Pauline special, Donnie Marie and all of those guys, George Lucas and the other people involved with Star wars were afraid that Star wars was going to, like, disappear from people's mind. Like they were going to forget about Star Wars. So they had to keep doing things to keep Star wars in people's, scope. Right. So they appeared on Donny and Marie. There's this go on YouTube. Okay. There's this great episode of Donnie and Marie where they're dancing on stage with Stormtroopers. Kris Kristofferson is dressed as Han Solo. Marie, is, Princess Leia. It's hysterical. Richard Pryor had a special, and he convinced them to have, like, all the characters from the Tatooine bar. And it's just like, really, you. It was, like, the biggest movie ever.

>> Mike: Yeah.


The Star Wars Holiday special is really bad. I mean, it's hindsight

>> Darin: And they were convinced that it was going to leave people's mind, they were going to forget about it, and they had to keep it on top of people's minds so that they would go see Empire Strikes Back when it came out three years later.

>> Mike: I can kind of see that, though, a little bit. I mean.

>> Darin: Yeah, it's hindsight.

>> Mike: Hindsight. Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Hindsight is clearly where we're going to.

>> Darin: But I'm like, they were really concerned. Forget about Star Wars.

>> Mike: Yeah. It makes you wonder how much of our love for Star wars was because m. It was stuck in our heads. I think the. Yeah.

>> Darin: But I mean, Harvey Corman plays four or five characters in it, and, it's. I mean, the Star Wars Holiday special is really bad.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Maude. Okay. What's her face? who played Maude from the Golden Girls? Bea Arthur. She sings a song in it.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: And they had interviews with her from, you know, obviously before she died. But, you know, one of the points that they made was, okay, yeah. So many people talk about how bad it was. Looking at it now. At the time, kids who watched it thought it was great.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Did you ever watch the Ewok movies when they were on?

>> Darin: I saw some of one of the Ewok specials.

>> Mike: I saw one of them when they were On. In. Like, actually on. And I didn't think it was that bad.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: I thought it was gonna suck. Even as a kid, I was like, this is gonna be terrible. And I started watching it, and it was pretty good. Turns out, it. It does suck.

>> Darin: Yeah. Well, so many people say that the Ewoks were horrible in Return of the Jedi. I thought they were cute.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: That's the. Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah. M. But they didn't. Okay.


Over holiday break, we watched Die Hard with the kids. You know what? That movie holds up

So their. Their problem was that Lucas childrenized Return of the Jedi too much with the Ewoks, which I think is what he did with those.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: I hated the prequels. I hated them. Hated it.

>> Mike: You don't say.

>> Darin: I hated those. I can't stand Jar Jar Binks. It was awful. God awful.

>> Dave: M. You are listening to Irritable Dad Syndrome now in a convenient resealable bag.

>> Darin: You'll be happy that I've done this. Over holiday break, we watched Die Hard with the kids.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Last week we watched First Blood with Jacob and Cameron.

>> Mike: Really? Oh, yeah. Today.

>> Darin: Loved. You know what? That movie holds up.

>> Mike: It does.

>> Darin: It still holds up.

>> Mike: I watch. Yeah. Usually I watch the, The Rambo and Rocky, movies, once a year. I. Yeah, it just naturally happens.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: For some reason this Christmas break it didn't. But usually it does. Yeah. First Blood and the. And did you watch First Blood Part 2?

>> Darin: We started First Blood Part 2. We got like 10 minutes, 20 minutes into it or something.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: he went back to, To Thailand.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And was hanging by the plane and then, Fell. Yeah. Yeah.

>> Mike: Sorry, I've got the soundtrack.

>> Darin: No, it's okay.

>> Mike: You know that's a James Cameron joint.

>> Darin: Yes. Yeah. I didn't know that.

>> Mike: And it. I will say this. A, it holds up. And B, I think if it were released today, it would be rated G. I'm sure. I think there's a Muppet somewhere in there. Wembley, the Fraggle is in. Is in the, In the forest somewhere.

>> Darin: But, yeah, it was really, really good. We just. Really super. Yeah, I'm coming to get you.

>> Mike: Best line in Sylvester Stallone's.


Dwayne: I think Rambo should have stopped with Rambo 5

>> Darin: But I'm telling you, the. And I was watching, like, when I watched Die Hard, I forgot, like, everybody's talking about Alan Rickman being the villain. The real villain was that guy who was the,

>> Mike: Dwayne.

>> Darin: Yeah, the. The guidance counselor in Breakfast Club. This is my show. No one's telling me how to run this. I'm going to.

>> Mike: I'm not the one that got on live tv, Dwayne.

>> Darin: Yeah, I know. Yeah.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: He was just like, what's. What was the actor's name?

>> Mike: He was the principal in Paul Gleason. Yeah.

>> Darin: He wasn't the Princip, like, the guidance counselor. He was whoever who was in charge of study hall. And he had to do. He had to do detention, that weekend or whatever. Don't mess with the bull, young man. You'll get the horns. Yeah, he's the bad guy.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: I couldn't stand him. Alan Rickman at least was, you know, had charisma.

>> Mike: Yeah. Paul Gleason was just him and the, FBI guys.

>> Darin: Yes. Yes.

>> Mike: Agent Johnson. This is Agent Johnson. No relation.

>> Darin: But then, you know, it's the same thing with Brian Dennehy and First Blood.

>> Mike: Oh, yeah.

>> Darin: This is my town, and I'm going to run things my way, and no one's going to be in here vagrating and get out of here and whatever.

>> Mike: Yeah, you're vag.

>> Darin: And he had warning after warning after warning after warning, and Brian Dennehy would not listen.

>> Mike: I. One of the reasons. What is the, Colonel Troutman. What is that actor's name?

>> Darin: Oh, oh, oh. Richard Krena.

>> Mike: One of the reasons I watch the Rambo movies over and over is for Richard Krena. He over acts his part.

>> Darin: Oh, yeah.

>> Mike: So awesomely. Like, it goes beyond. There's, a point where you overact so much that it comes back around and it's Oscar worthy.

>> Darin: I built that machine.

>> Mike: Yeah. What you call hell, he calls home. Eat things a goat wouldn't eat.

>> Darin: Yes.

>> Mike: Yeah. Sergeant, your men are already dead. You know, it's all just. It's just.

>> Darin: You can actually hear Sylvester Sloan typing the keys.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: You're better already dead. Yeah, because he. Stallone wrote the screenplay with, two other people.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah. He wrote all these. All these things. Like, he bought the character of Rambo. So in. In the original book for First Blood, Rambo dies, John Rambo m Dies. And. And when Stallone was doing the movies, like, I don't want him to die. I want to make, like, a million sequels. I'll go big.

>> Darin: Seventeen sequels.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah. I loved it. It was great.

>> Mike: Yeah. I think he should have stopped with Rambo 4. Just my. I love the Rambo series, but I don't think Rambo5 needed to be there.

>> Darin: I can't remember. The last one I saw was Rambo 5 the last one?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Okay, then Rambo 4 was the last one. That was violent as hell.

>> Mike: Oh, yeah.

>> Darin: I had blood dripping out of my screen.

>> Mike: Yeah. Rambo 4 is basically the special effects guys coming up to Sylvester Stallone and saying, with cgi, we can put blood everywhere. Yeah.


Rambo 3 is Sylvester Stallone saying people need more violence

Like, okay, yeah, yeah, let's do it. What happens if you get me on a.50 caliber?

>> Darin: Huh?

>> Mike: That's in the jungle for some reason. And I shoot at 500 people. What happens? And they're like, here it is.

>> Darin: I mean, there were people who were never shot or stabbed that were just bleeding.

>> Mike: They just blow up.

>> Darin: Why am I bleeding?

>> Mike: Yeah. And he. He sneaks up behind the guy.

>> Darin: My nose is bleeding.

>> Mike: Killing's as easy as breathing. And then he chops the dude's head off with the machete. He turns into Jason Voorhees. He does in Rambo 4.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Look at each of them. First Blood. He's actually trying to not, He just goes. It's like a. It's a serious movie.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: I mean, really.

>> Darin: He grabbed hold of Brian Dennehy and said, dude, this is where you stop.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Right?

>> Mike: And then, you know, First Blood Part 2 is just James Cameron said, I'm gonna make this practically a cartoon. Yeah. And then Rambo 3 is Sylvester Stallone saying, people need more of that. You know, and whatever. We're gonna, My favorite scene in Rambo 3 is him and Richard Corinna standing in the desert. And Rambo has a machine gun and, like, the, like, 50 tanks, three helicopters, a, thousand soldiers. A nuke is shooting at him. And he just goes, yes.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And they all die. It's awesome. In Rambo 4, it's like he doesn't think, you know, I'm a peaceful man.

>> Darin: He just goes in with a knife.

>> Mike: He's like. He's using his rice cooker. He's trying to get the starter going, but, you know, with the, He's doing all that stuff with the Ouija board and. And the salt. And then. And then these people are like, well, we want to go to Burma. You got a gun. Yeah. You're not changing anything. That's. It's.

>> Darin: Yeah, I know.

>> Mike: And they go. And then you're on a boat with Rambo. He's Captain Peace. But, you know, it's only a matter of time before somebody.

>> Darin: He gets triggered.

>> Mike: It triggers him.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And then. Oh, Nelly m. Here come the.50 caliber in the middle of the jungle.

>> Darin: That used to be like, every Chuck Norris movie. He was just fine.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah. And everything was good.

>> Mike: And trimming his beard.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: He would, stretching.

>> Darin: Chuck Norris would defend himself.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Right. But then you killed my dog. And then he does the slow walk down the Hallway. And then he kicks everybody's ass. Then you killed his best friend. And then. Yeah, that slow walk down the hall. I remember because we were kids. We're like, oh, here we go. Chuck Norris.

>> Mike: I was watching a, podcast. They were talking about the Death Wish series. How, the first. Have you seen the Death Wish with Charles.

>> Darin: Charles Bronson? Yeah.

>> Mike: Yeah. He's like a vigilante. And the first couple, it's like, oh, somebody's got to get, you know, attacked somebody in his family.


Mike: The movie is green. It's a Ron Howard joint. And I'm having a hard time enjoying it

By the time you get to death wish 15, it showed a scene of it. He walks out. There's, like, people trying to get in his car. And he goes, hey, that's my car. Pulls out a gun.

>> Darin: What happened? What happened? Hey, what happened? Do you know that they tried to get Charles Bronson to play the character in City Slickers? He turned them down. Really pissed. Yeah.

>> Mike: Really?

>> Darin: Charles Bronson doesn't die in those movies. Yeah, right. So they give it to Jack Palance. Jack Palance wins an Academy Award.

>> Mike: Yeah. Awesome.

>> Darin: Yeah. I crap bigger than you. We watched this movie called in the Heart of the Sea.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: With Chris, Hemsworth.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: And then Spider man was also in it.

>> Mike: Tom Holland.

>> Darin: Tom Holland. Thank you. And it's based on the story of when, the dude. It's based on the true story of the whale that attacked the ship. That ended up being the book. Moby Dick.

>> Mike: Free Willy.

>> Darin: Okay. No, no, no. Okay. Moby Dick. Okay. It's a Ron Howard joint. Oh, right.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And we're watching this movie over at my mom's house, and the movie is green. Okay. They get out onto the ocean.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And the movie's green. And I'm having a hard time enjoying this movie because I'm thinking I'm gonna have to take. Take Mom's TV down and get it fixed because, her TV is green.

>> Mike: So they must have filmed it in Destin. Maybe it's because of the water's green there.

>> Darin: The sun would shine, and the sun was, like a bright yellow, and the water was green.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: And I'm just like. Everyone's like, this is a really good movie. I'm like, this movie is green. Yeah. This movie's greener than the Green Mile.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Right. Which we also watched over break. And after it was over with, I changed over to something else. Then it was fine, because I even went and started jacking with Mom's settings. I'm like, I've got a fixture. Your. Something's wrong with your tv. Right. You go on to, The Reddit's, as you call it.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And I was like, in the heart of the sea. Green. And like. Yeah, that movie is really green.

>> Mike: Oh, yeah.

>> Darin: And I don't know why Ron Howard did it was uncomfortably, unnaturally, weirdly, it's like green.

>> Mike: the, The first Matrix was like that intentionally. Yeah. Their parts were green. And then suddenly it's almost like it's black and white and it's like. What? I don't even know what happened to the TV here.

>> Darin: I thought, like, the ocean was gonna Hulk out on me because it was green, folks.

>> Mike: Was it green?

>> Darin: It was green.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Greener than Kermit the Frog's ass.

>> Mike: Wow.

>> Darin: Hello, M. Time M. To wrap up.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Close this out, Mike.

>> Mike: Yeah, I see you. We.

>> Darin: I usually close more elegantly than that.

>> Mike: You.


You can still listen to our Christmas episode. Perfect for after holiday listening

You do better at that. My. My energy is. I'm bad. Yeah.

>> Darin: We're gonna go, We hope you go to irritabledancendome.com, download every episode we have. You know, I was gonna say I was kind of disappointed. You and I, we put a lot into our Christmas episode.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Ah.

>> Darin: And it's so far past Christmas. Ain't nobody watching the Christmas episode anymore. You can still listen to our Christmas episode. It's got a great, great story and about Mike's dogs humping each other. Perfect for after holiday listening.

>> Mike: Ah.

>> Darin: God, I'm gonna shut up. We hope to see you next week on Irritable Dad Syndrome.

>> Dave: Irritable dad Syndrome is a Quinn Martin production copyright 1972.

>> Mike: We had a pretty good, decent group of people here.

>> Darin: Yeah. Yeah.

>> Mike: They're all getting. They're talking about the French toast and the guacamole, and, they're going all over the place.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: The power of crust compels you. That's awesome.

>> Darin: I get that.

>> Mike: Boy, this went up fast.

>> Darin: You said that last week.

>> Mike: Anybody, that wants to follow us on Blue sky, we're irritable dad.bsky social.

>> Darin: How many followers do we have on?

>> Mike: We have six. Oh, well, which includes me. Oh, my gosh.

>> Darin: Hey, Yeah. We hope you see you next.

>> Mike: Jesus.

>> Darin: 3, 2, 1. Is it your trumpet?

>> Mike: Red, from Shawshank Redemption? Sorry. That's. Red would net red.

>> Darin: You don't think he would.

>> Mike: Nope. He went to the same place that Burns did. And M. He saw the inscription. That's right. He said, nope.

>> Darin: That's right.

>> Mike: Yeah. Sorry.

>> Darin: That's okay.

>> Mike: Call back. Shake it up, shake it down, Move.

>> Darin: It in, move it round.

>> Mike: Disco, baby.

>> Darin: Move it in, move it out, Move.

>> Mike: It in and about. Disco, baby. You're still here? It's over. Go home. Go. Bye.